We all want to feel important. Often, we do not admit this or even realize it; however, we take small actions every day to try to tell the world we matter. It may be throwing on a designer necklace, wearing our sorority letters, or posting a specific Instagram photo. None of this is bad. Most of the time we want to invest in high-quality items, be proud of our organization, or share our experiences; however, other times, we do this because we want the world to know that we are important. Although this need for importance often manifests itself in these types of actions, there is another way it manifests itself on college campuses that I think is much more threatening to our mental well-being.
The accessory of our generation is not Tori Burch flats or a Kate Spade purse. The accessory of our generation, the one that really makes us feel like we matter, is being busy. We all wear it. Rushing around with a cup of coffee. Comparing packed agendas with friends. Pulling all-nighters. It’s no surprise this look is so important to us. It is what our college applications were looking for and what our future jobs may look at. Not who we are, but how busy we are. How much can we do and how important can we become in every activity.
Don’t get me wrong, ambition is not bad. In no way am I saying you should not chase every dream, leadership position, and volunteer opportunity that calls your name. You are a total Girl Boss and your ambition and passion will get you so far; however, I do believe that ambition and passion can fall flat if we never take the time to recharge. Think about your passions as a fire. A fire takes work. To even get it started you have to find wood, place it in the right way and have the tools or skills to get that first spark going. Even after you get it started, it cannot just keep growing on its own. Without proper upkeep, it will eventually burn out.
Your passions and ambitions that make you so capable of doing all the things you love are the same way. If you never have a moment to do the things you love, and I mean the ones a college application or job interview won’t ask about, then the things you are passionate about will become a daunting task instead of a grand adventure. You’ll realize you forgot to keep the fire going and that you have to start anew.
Inevitably, there will be times when the busy nature of our society takes control. When that happens, you will find it takes weeks, months, or, in the worst scenario, years to find the right firewood and get the flames going again.
But that is not the only choice. What if we were not afraid to say we needed a day off. If we did not think that signing up for one less club was a weakness. If we took the time to read a book, journal, or go for a walk. If when our friend told us about their homework our reply was “I’m so proud of your hard work” instead of “you’ll never believe how busy I am” because we knew how stressed we were was not how important we were. How much more loved would our friend feel? How freeing would it be to know that we are already enough even before our resume is filled to the brim?
Here is the thing: when we look back on life, we will not remember how many activities we had or how many tests we took. We will remember the experiences we had and the ways we grew wiser. I could not tell you every organization I volunteered for, but I could tell you about one night at the Ronald McDonald House that meant the world. I could not tell you how many honors or AP classes I was in, but I can tell you that Honors American Studies changed the way I think about our country. I could not tell you how much coffee it took to sustain me during busy weeks, but I can describe the feeling of peace on slow mornings drinking coffee and exchanging stories with my parents.
It is way too easy in this society to base your life’s worth on the resume, but at the end of the day, nothing in writing will matter if it did not matter in action.
So, chase your dreams at a full sprint, but don’t forget that the cool down lap will help you prevent injury, and no one ever enjoyed a race with an injured leg.