Why the “Strong Black Woman” Act Negatively Impacts Our Mental Health

Imagine yourself sinking underwater, pressure building up in your ears and crushing your eardrums. Imagine gasping for air and wishing you could scream for help. But you don’t, in fear of someone equating the plea as weakness. This constant constraint of being unable to express yourself freely negatively impacts my community, especially black women. 

Something that you are born with and can never change is your race. No amount of bleach or denial can modify the skin you were born in. As a black woman, I have been judged based on this factor. 

I have grown to realize it doesn’t matter how kind you are. You will be judged on the one thing you can’t change. Due to this factor, I have continuously boxed my feelings in my whole life. Yes, my whole life. 

What is a Strong Black Woman?

Being a strong black woman means simply to be a black woman. Vulnerability isn’t in our vocabulary. In fact, it’s frowned upon. While strong is an uplifting word, this term is a reminder of survival. The self sacrificing actions that we put ourselves through make us resilient at the end of the day, but at what cost?

Expression is necessary for growth and quite frankly, it’s emotionally exhausting to be praised for being strong when you’re tired. Generationally, this mindset has been passed down from the women before us, causing the new generation to internalize this and repeat the same mistakes.

I didn’t see my mother cry until I was a junior in high school, around the same age I was still hiding my tears from people. Seeing her cry didn’t make me think any less of her, in fact, it humanized her. My mother showing a more vulnerable side of herself helped me realize that showing emotions, in any way, was important. 

Mental Health 

Ultimately, this negatively impacts our mental health because of the lack of ability to be able to ask for help or even feel comfortable speaking about our emotions. If your walls are constantly up out of fear, and you feel that you can’t express yourself, then falling into a depression or experiencing anxiety might be in your future.

Instead of being submerged, learn how to take a deep breath. While we can’t change the past, working on yourself in the present is just as important. Mental health, along with healing, should never be put on the back burner on the list of things you need to take care of. Prioritizing yourself shouldn’t seem like a chore either. The “Strong Black Woman” act may continue, but reclaiming the title by expressing your emotions, asking for help, and being authentically yourself is what exhibits real strength. 

• #Black History Month
• black women
• mental health