Let’s just say math has never been my strong suit. I never experienced a traditional education, because instead of public school, I was homeschooled. Or should I say: unschooled.
“Sweetie, the ladies in this family have never been good at math,” I remember my mom cooing, while she ignored my paper of ungraded math problems. I gave it a shot, I really did, but my parents did not teach me much beyond simple addition, subtraction, and multiplication. I remember trying to teach myself from a bulky book called Saxon Math 5/6, but it just made my brain feel tired and confused. I ended up getting my GED (General Equivalency Diploma), and I simply guessed my way through the math problems to obtain my ticket to college. When I entered college, my math comprehension was around a 4th grader’s level.
For the first two years of college, I was horrified at the fact I would have to take at least College Algebra in order to graduate. Math was my shameful little secret. I felt sure that one day someone would realize what a fraud I was attending college with such a low-level education, and I was terrified of the possibility that someone would task me to solve a simple math problem that I would be unable to figure out. Once in a science class lab, I was unable to solve a simple equation for a group project. The guy sitting next to me could not control his laughter about it and later I went home and cried.
Math had to be conquered, so I started with small steps. I took an Introduction to Mathematics course and knew I would have to dedicate 100% effort just to pass. “What is the little two beside the number?” I asked my boyfriend as I worked on homework for the class, and his face filled with surprise. I did not even understand the concept of a squared number.
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Surprisingly, with almost daily visits to the Math and Science Resource Center and lots of tears, I starting learning the math I had never learned before. I was relentless in my quest to pass the class. When the end of the semester came, I speechlessly stared at my final grade: an A+. The clock was ticking and College Algebra was a prerequisite to classes I had to take in order to graduate on time. The first day of that class was spent hyperventilating in the back of the classroom, trying not to cry. Also, I know I’ve mentioned crying three times so far, but I’d like to go on record and see I don’t shed tears often. Just about math, mostly.
I don’t know how I made it, and I’m sure if you’re reading this, you don’t know how you’ll make it through that math class either.
My first test? 25 points. Out of 100. But I went to tutoring, desperately questioned friends on how to work equations, had my boyfriend help with the online portion, and I learned everything I needed to know. My final test score was a 98/100. I’m here to tell you that if a GED kid with no high school math experience can pass Algebra, you can too. I understand the anxiety, tears, hopelessness that accompanies math. So take courage face these final weeks of school with a brave heart.