As a third year with graduating looming over my head, Iām all too familiar with the anxiety about life after university.
Iāll be sitting in the bottom floor of George Green or Hallward minding my own business, when my ears decide to clock in to nearby conversations of grad jobs and the future. All of a sudden, my mind is filled with stress-induced thoughts about how I have no clue what my future holds or itās eating at my insecurities of falling behind my peers. My final year of university has been anything but peaceful. With friendship drama, personal troubles and the stress of managing university around a full-time job, I feel blessed to even get a good nightās sleep or just a day where I donāt overthink my future. Weāre all familiar with the saying ācomparison is the thief of joyā, and Iām no stranger to my friends telling me that everything will work out fine in the end. But when people ask me what my plans are next year, I canāt help but feel embarrassed to answer after theyāve just announced to the whole library how theyāve secured a spot within the āBig Fourā. How do I find it in me to say that Iām carrying on with a full-time retail job, just to save up enough money to move back to London, all in the hopes of getting into my dream Masters program?
Thus, the spiralling begins. I start to think that my grades arenāt enough to get me into that school, and Iāll have to settle for something else. Then comes the thoughts of not doing well enough at all and I find myself stuck in a retail job, in a city I canāt wait to get out of. And finally the piĆØce de rĆ©sistance: the thought of letting down my parents, after everything theyāve been through and all Iāve done to make them just a little bit proud.bIāll still have days where I get consumed by these thoughts, but after a solid four months of spiralling, I think I can finally say I see a light at the end of the tunnel. Life right now may not be perfect, and I may not have a solid idea of my future, but Iāve started to learn there is no need to compare myself toothers. Just because others appear to have their futures sorted and they’re living the dream, doesnāt mean my plans are any less. Even though my life now may be different to the dreams of my starry-eyed 18-year-old self as she first walked through the doors of her Broadgate flat (yeah, Iām a Broadgate Park survivor and itās probably one of my biggest uni successes), these last three years have shaped me into a person that Iām close to saying I can be proud of.
To be honest, thereās something exhilarating about an unknown future. For the first time in nearly 16 years, Iām taking a break from education and stepping into the big, scary yet very real world. I get tospend the next year living with some of my closest friends, making new memories, and entering this next chapter of my life, a baby step at a time. The excitement of escaping crushing coursework deadlines and caffeine-fuelled all-nighters is all too appealing, and the lessening burden of meeting my familyās expectations is most definitely an eye-catcher.
But at the same time, the biggest reminder of all is this: itās okay to take it slow. Yes, university was a big jump, and for many, it was our first grasp of independence. Life after graduation is an even bigger change for all of us, and the only thing we can ask of ourselves is to take it easy. We wonāt get things right straight away and we may not have a solid idea of what our future looks like, but thatās no reason to be hard on ourselves. Our 20s is an opportunity to grow and find ourselves, and with every little step weāre building a future to be proud of.
This crippling anxiety about what life will be like in five or six months is most likely a universal event for most students about to graduate, and hopefully whilst reading this, some of you might feel heard. For those who do, youāre not alone. Going into this new chapter is a new experience for us all, and thatās exactly what we need to try and focus on. We finally get the chance to create our ideal future, whatever path we might take to get there. Eventually, weāll grow to love what weāve made of our life and university will be the centre of our trips down memory lane.