It’s Okay To Not Be Okay

The coronavirus has brought on an onslaught of articles and social media posts about all the ways you can thrive during quarantine: discover your passion for fitness, begin a new hobby, start a journal, learn to cook, read a bunch of books, and on and on. None of these suggestions is bad advice and if these are activities you want to engage in to help you feel better then, by all means, you should pursue them. But the underlying principle of these recommendations is that you should be doing something productive and joyful with the time you have gained by staying at home and this simply isn’t true.

We are going through a global pandemic. It is by far the craziest widespread occurrence that anyone our age has ever experienced. Graduations have been postponed, sporting events canceled, and our day-to-day lives are completely disrupted. This reality should not be taken lightly. Of course, there are benefits to seeking out positivity during challenging times, but that doesn’t mean that you aren’t allowed to be sad about the canceled events, scared about the future and lonely from the lack of social interaction. It’s okay to not be okay.

I’ve found that when I try to bottle up my emotions, they tend to come out in ugly ways later on. This has become very apparent while living with my family and seeing barely anyone else for the past month. Sadness is a more vulnerable emotion than anger so it’s always tempting to mask my true emotion and replace it with an angry front. For me, this emerges through snapping at my siblings for insignificant actions and getting mad at my parents for comments that they didn’t mean anything by. These heated interactions simply lead to more anger and they’re not healthy.

However, when I have been able to open up about how I’m feeling, I have found so much love and comfort from them. It’s not easy and it’s something that I’m working on every day, but it’s good to know that everyone in your home is probably feeling the sadness that you’re feeling, and talking it through with them is much better than ignoring the emotion altogether. Other people who are great to talk to about how much this situation sucks are your friends. They’re most likely feeling just like you are, and they’re the perfect people to vent to and cry with without judgment. Remember that you’re not alone in not being okay.

I want to emphasize that I’m not endorsing constant wallowing or selfishness. Recognize that people are dying and be grateful that you’re safe. Search for joy and find a healthy routine. But also know that your sadness isn’t trivial and that you are entitled to your emotions. Have a good cry, watch a sad movie, scream into your pillow and listen to a sad song on repeat, but most importantly understand that you’re allowed to say, “this just sucks.”

Note: Sadness is distinct from depression. If you are struggling with mental health, look to these resources to help. You don’t need to suffer by yourself!

• Coronavirus
• health