Midterm week(s) here at Notre Dame is finally coming to a close for most of us, and we will soon, if not already, receive grades for all the papers and exams and see if all the hard work and hours of studying have paid off. Sometimes getting the exam grade back is worse than taking the actual exam itself, because grades around midterms and finals are the be-all and end-all of a college student, well at least they are for me. As students, and people, we are constantly pushing ourselves to strive for excellence and achieve the goals we have set for ourselves and exceed the expectations put upon us by others. My entire life I have always strived to achieve my goals whether it be college or a future career, but when I don’t live up to those goals, I am always the hardest on myself, and then push myself to do better.
Now pushing yourself to do better is not necessarily a bad thing. By encouraging ourselves to improve based on a negative experience, whether it be for academics or career, we are in a way helping ourselves to achieve and reach these goals. However, there needs to be a balance between pushing ourselves to do better, while also congratulating ourselves on the job well done thus far. I have found that when I don’t achieve the goals I have set for myself, I am disappointed and feel bad about myself, and use those feelings as motivation for success. But, we should not have to demean ourselves and what we have done in order to achieve success in the future, rather our motivation should come from the feeling of the accomplishment itself. This is why we must congratulate ourselves on all of our successes no matter how small. At times, we are our own worst enemy, when we should be our biggest advocates.
When I say “congratulating yourself” I am referring to the idea that you need to hold the things you do and yourself to a higher standard. The article, “Why Self-Awareness Isn’t Doing More to Help Women’s Careers” explains the idea that women are more self-aware and often downplay their own worth and what they bring to the table. I would say this also applies to how we perceive our own goals and achievements. For example, if I got a B on an essay that I worked really hard on I would be happy because I was expecting the worst and got a passing grade; however, I would soon realize that someone in the class got an A and I didn’t and I put in all that effort just to get a B. Now, a B is in no way a bad grade, but as high achieving students, attending a rigorous school, we expect more from ourselves, yet that doesn’t mean we should devalue ourselves and our accomplishments. As my parents like to tell me “You are too hard on yourself,” which is true, and because we put so much pressure and stress on ourselves to do well, we should give ourselves congratulations where it is due. So congratulations to me for getting through midterms week and putting in all that hard work. Congratulations to you all for getting through half a semester of Notre Dame during COVID and working hard. You deserve it and should be proud of what you’ve achieved, no matter how small. Think of everything you have done to get yourself to this point. I doubt it was easy and you deserve congratulations.
