Having your heart broken can be one of the most painful things in the world, and it can feel like it’s going to last forever. However, I’m here to tell you that it does get better! One day you’re going to wake up without that dull pain in your chest, and you’re going to realize that you’ll be okay.
1. Distance Yourself
While some exes can get along as friends after their breakup, I still think it’s a good idea to keep a little distance in the beginning. Constant contact directly after the breakup can keep you stuck in a place of dependency and denial. The moment I started to actually move on was when I stopped talking to him everyday. If you don’t plan on being friends, unfollow them on social media and try to refrain from checking their page. If you still want to be friends, I recommend muting them on social media until you feel like you’re in a place where seeing their pictures won’t affect you. I personally took some of our more romantic pictures off of my instagram page so it wouldn’t make me sad everytime I looked at it, but now as time has passed, I’m able to put them back up and keep them as memories.
2. Cry and Vent
Get it all out. There’s nothing wrong with crying over a lost relationship, it’s actually the healthy and normal thing to do. It’s a good way to get the overwhelming sadness out of your system so you can focus on the healing process. There is no set time period for when you should stop crying over them, but I promise you one day you just won’t feel the need to anymore. That doesn’t mean it won’t still hurt, it just means you’re slowly healing. Talking it out with a friend or family member can be very helpful. Get out all of your feelings so they’re not just swimming around in your mind. Write your thoughts out in a journal and be honest. It takes some of the weight off your chest to be able to talk through the breakup and understand it.
3. Go Out with Friends
I know this sounds cheesy, but it really works. When you get out of the room and are around other people, you’re distracting your mind from thinking about your ex. While it’s definitely okay and necessary to vent to your friends, it’s also important to have days where you don’t talk about your former relationship. Just have fun for that day, and it will make you realize that it is possible to have fun without your ex. You did it before you met them, and you can do it after.
4. Find a Healthy Distraction
While it’s nice to get out with your friends, it’s also important to be okay alone. Throw yourself into a new hobby or project. Personally, I started attending workout classes everyday, and I threw myself into developing my YouTube channel. Exercising helped get my frustration out and boosted my confidence again, and my YouTube channel kept my mind busy and working. You don’t realize it when it’s happening, but these distractions are slowly helping you move on. They’re filling your time instead of just waiting for it to pass by.
5. Realize It’s Okay to Miss Them
You should never feel pathetic or stupid about missing your ex. At the time, they were probably the closest person to you, so of course it’s going to feel weird not having them around. However, there is a clear distinction between missing them and wanting them back. If you still feel like you want them back, more distance and time might be the answer. However, if you feel that you can be around them without wanting to get back together, a friendship can definitely be possible. That being said, friendship comes with seeing pictures of them going out with other people, them moving on and them with future partners. If you think that you can handle that, I don’t see a problem with being friends. If you can’t, it’s okay to miss them from afar. The cheesy saying that time heals everything is very true, and even if you’re thinking of them months later, you’re slowly healing every day without even realizing it.