The ideal, healthy love

What is a healthy relationship? A question I asked myself the first day I even heard about boyfriends. It’s a hard question, I used to think it was based on opinion, to some extent it is, but then I realized, there is a basic foundation made up of qualities most everyone can agree with. Here are are some qualities that make up the foundation of the ever hoped for - Healthy Relationship.

Above else, trust.

Trust in a relationship helps ensure each person is not anxious about the relationship but happy. The worst feeling in the world is anxiety or worry for the “what ifs”. When your significant other goes to work and you worry if he’s talking to another girl, if he’s really at work, if he’s meeting someone better. The best way to develop this trust so you don’t feel that way, is within yourself. Make sure that you trust in all you are. If you’re insecure that your body isn’t sexy like other girls so he must be off cheating, than the first step is within. Love yourself, know that they chose to be with you and gosh darn it, they are just as lucky to have your body. Confidence is vital to ensure the trust. Sometimes, I can definitely admit I’ve done it, you’re the one putting things into your head about cheating and lies because you just can’t believe their with someone like you. Those thoughts ruin relationships, don’t be the cause of it. Also, make sure even if you’re not 100% confident, which who really is, that you accept/expect reassurance. It is helpful to have your partner reassure your greatest insecurities to help you grow and learn that you are amazing.

 

Respect, Respect, Respect some more.

Jokes are fun, but there should always be an underlying respect. Each person should be able to feel comfortable being themselves, should always come as important and not have to beg for attention and most importantly be treated kindly. The point is, kidding around teasing someone is different then putting them now and making fun of their biggest insecurity. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean every second of the day being together and complimenting each other, but I do mean being supportive and showing love. Respect can be in big things, if you’re not comfortable with having sex yet, giving a purity ring. Or, if you want to show your commitment and promise together, give a promise ring. Smaller things can include, holding the door open for each other, opening the car door when getting in and reminding them, they are proud to be with you and you should be proud of who you are.

Compromise, it’s not worth the fight.

I think personally, this is the hardest part for me in a relationship. I am a very strong willed person and so is my boyfriend. It’s hard for me to listen to anyone else’s suggestion when I’ve already made up my mind. It can be bigger things just like everything else. I want to put my own bed sheets on the bed, their floral and soft, but he wants his, plain and blue. We can choose to fight, be dramatic, take it way out of context and decide we must break up because we can’t agree on our sheet colors. Instead we get the best of both, blue floral sheets. Honestly, as silly as it sounds because it is, compromise is always needed even for the little random things. It is very easy for two strong minded people to get into a fight about wanting only what they want. But, the best feeling is avoiding the argument and making that compromise. I used to think a long time ago, letting your wants and needs sit in the backseat meant giving up your voice and independence. It doesn’t it means that you love someone and care about their wants enough to make the compromise.

Love, just love

All in all, it’s a simple concept. Love that person in every way you can and how they deserve. It is hard in life to make things simple, to completely be yourself, to trust in someone, to always respect them and to always make the effort to compromise. More than anything, to love them. But, with these tips and making sure to listen to your heart, you’ll get a great, healthy and strong relationship. It won’t be perfect, but nothing is and ever will be. It will perfectly, imperfect. It will be yours.