Grief is messy. It doesn’t follow a schedule, it doesn’t care about your workload, and it doesn’t ask permission before it crashes into your day. If you’ve ever lost someone—especially to something as sudden and heartbreaking as an overdose—you know how life can feel like it’s split into “before” and “after.”
I recently lost a close friend this way, and while no words can erase the pain, I’ve been learning that grief doesn’t have to be something we survive in silence. Here are a few things that have helped me (and may help you) as you figure out how to move through the hardest days.
1. Allow Yourself to Feel It All
Grief isn’t just sadness—it can be anger, guilt, confusion, numbness, or all of the above. There’s no “wrong” way to feel. Pretending you’re okay when you’re not only builds pressure. Journaling, crying, or even just admitting “today is hard” is a step toward healing.
2. Don’t Carry It Alone
Talking about overdose loss can feel complicated. People may not know what to say, or you might worry about judgment. But sharing your story—whether with a close friend, a counselor, or a support group—can lift some of the weight. You don’t have to tell everything at once, but letting others in makes the road less lonely.
3. Find Healthy Anchors
When life feels unstable, small routines can help. Take a walk, cook a meal, paint your nails, watch a comfort show—whatever grounds you. These aren’t distractions; they’re reminders that you’re still here, still living, still deserving of moments of peace.
4. Honor Their Memory
Grief can feel less paralyzing when we channel it into remembrance. Maybe that’s making a playlist of songs you shared, writing them a letter, volunteering for a cause they’d care about, or simply lighting a candle. Choosing to celebrate their life helps shift focus from the loss to the love that remains.
5. Be Gentle With Your Timeline
Grief doesn’t expire after a week, a semester, or even a year. There will be days when you feel okay and others when the loss hits fresh. Healing isn’t about “moving on”—it’s about moving forward, carrying them with you in a new way.
6. When It Feels Overwhelming, Ask for Help
If your grief ever feels unbearable—like you can’t get through the day, or you’re struggling with your own safety—please reach out. Campus counseling centers, trusted professors, and national hotlines (like 988 in the U.S.) are there to hold you when you can’t hold yourself.
Final Thoughts
Losing someone to an overdose is devastating, and it can bring layers of grief that feel heavier than most people talk about. But you are not alone in this. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means building a life where their memory still matters, and where you can still grow, love, and hope again.
✨ If you’re reading this and grieving, know that you are allowed to take up space in your sadness. You are allowed to heal slowly. And you are allowed to still dream about the future, even while you carry this loss with you.