One of the hardest experiences is telling someone you love them and them telling you that they do not love you back. Love is an all encompassing feeling. It puts you in a state of bliss. It fills every inch of your body like an open sky peering on a field of grass. But, what happens when someone openly admits that they don’t feel the same way for you?
“Like” and “love” are two different feelings. When we like someone, it’s very easy to love the qualities about them without loving them as a person. You may be able to recognize all of the reasons why someone else could love them, but you just do not have that level of emotions for them. That’s ok. You’re not a villain or evil for not loving, you’re human. You’re not the victim or unworthy for not being loved, you’re still amazing.
When love is unrequited, one can find themselves questioning why they are not “enough”? You’re still the amazing person you are, but you’re entitled to your feelings just as much as the other person in the equation. We can’t force or expect other people to feel a certain way about us. Love is a strong emotion that cannot be conjured up in day or faked. It requires time, care, attention and it has to be genuine. We all find love in different ways, which is why we can’t always assume that it is going to be reciprocal.
You’re enough and you will always be enough. Someday, someone else will see the amazing attributes you have to offer to the world and will love every one of them and will love you with all of your being. Patience and acceptance of oneself will open up the possibilities of receiving that love. We cannot fully receive love if we do not fully love ourselves. Why is that? If we don’t hold the capability of loving ourselves then we aren’t fully accessing the parts of us that make us capable of being loved.
This knowledge isn’t something I pulled out of my pocket. It’s something I’ve learned through experience and realizations. It’s much better to tell someone you love them and have it unrequited than to have someone express love for you and find out it was a lie. The truth is always better than a lie that was told to comfort you in the moment. If someone does not love you but you love them, they are not trying to hurt you, or have you feel lesser than you are. They are expressing how they feel and that takes as much vulnerability and courage as admitting loving someone.
The hurt is not intentional, and you are not irrational for feeling this way. However, the pain will pass, and you’ll only learn to grow from the experience. Unrequited love does not mean you’re not worth it. You’re worth everything and reciprocal love does not define our importance or impact, it simply states that someone else was able to love the qualities that you found lovable as well. Love yourself first and then love can be received.