“Ah, yes. It’s been awhile since you’ve subjected yourself to an article.”
My friend was right. It’s been awhile since I’ve subjected myself to an article for the sake of Her Campus. This time I’m not interviewing strangers on the campus shuttle on their political views or going on seven blind dates. I’m tackling something slightly more personal and, quite honestly, painful to do. I asked five people what they see as my biggest flaw and what I should change about myself. I did this because if there’s one thing I believe, it’s that we can always do better and never stop learning whether it’s personally, professionally, or anything in between. This semester I haven’t felt so great about where I am in either category, so I enlisted my friends and family for help. Here’s what they said I should change:
1. I think you should not be so hard on yourself.
2. Be firm.
3. Don’t be so scared. Trust what you think is right. Don’t think you need to get confirmation from someone else before you go ahead. You know what you’re doing.
4. You just don’t give yourself a break and you’re so focused on the future which, again, is so awesome but I just feel like you never give yourself time to breathe.
5. Be confident
Basically, I have the backbone of an arthritic jellyfish who is incapable of taking a break. Growing up, I was never the confident girl I saw my sisters to be and, to this day, beat myself up every day for not doing enough or not doing well enough. It made getting through each day difficult to do. Looking at this list made these problems real. I never realized my lack of confidence was this obvious, and it was painful to hear. I knew it had to change.
I decided to write this list on a few post-it notes to put around my room, in my car, on my notebooks, and on the back of my phone. I wanted to ensure that remaining confident and being able to cut myself some slack would be at the forefront of my mind each day until I no longer had to think about it.
Throughout the first week that I did this I noticed a change in my demeanor, the way I interacted with others, and I could finally confidently say I liked who I was becoming. This list became my little superpower. Every now and then I’d look at it and suddenly feel a rare strength. Knowing what my weaknesses are and tackling them one at a time made me feel powerful, like I was finally in control of how I felt about myself and how I portray myself to be. This list is something I still keep at the front of my mind and work on, but I wake up every day knowing I can do it.
Getting feedback from people that really know you is something I suggest everyone do. We get caught up in just getting through the day that we neglect to take a second and reflect on who we’ve become, whether we like them or not. You never know, you might just surprise yourself and find a side of you that you never knew was there. I know I did.