Looking back on my childhood, there are a lot of things I wish I knew that would have better prepared me for where I am now. There were so many superficial things I was worried about in middle school and knowing what I know now, I wasted so much time and energy focused on the wrong things. Although I don’t regret the decisions I made, because it was exactly what I wanted at the time, there is a lot of advice I wish I could tell myself to make adolescence a bit easier.
Here are some of the things I wish I could tell my 13-year-old self if I was given the chance.
Know your worth:
I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, knowing your worth is so important and I wish I knew how incredibly special I was when I was much younger. It’s so much easier to compare ourselves to others and wish we looked like someone else, but when it comes down to it, those other people aren’t any happier than we are. I was worthy of so much more happiness and opportunities growing up and I wish I would’ve known that sooner so I could’ve enjoyed life more and stopped putting myKnow your worth:self down all the time. This advice would have also been very helpful while dealing with picking the wrong friends and being put in toxic situations that I didn’t deserve.
Stop listening to bullies and haters:
Bullies come from a place of insecurity and negativity, and although their words hurt, people are going to talk about you regardless of what you do. It’s up to you to block out the negativity and work to be your most authentic self so you can go to bed every night knowing you did your best. Being proud of yourself and accomplishments is so much more fulfilling than tearing your dreams down because someone said you couldn’t do it. It’s also incredibly satisfying to look back and think about all the people who doubted you in the past, and now they get to see you thriving and enjoying life.
Don’t take time with family for granted:
There’s going to come a time where family members are going to get sick or not be in your life anymore, and spending quality time is so important, especially after it’s taken away from you. If living in a pandemic and past experiences have taught me anything, it’s that being in the moment and appreciating the people around you is more important than anything. You also don’t realize how much you love someone until they’re gone, and it shouldn’t take death for you to have all of these regrets and things you wish you had done differently. College and life in general are also going to get in the way, so spending that weekend afternoon with your siblings or calling your grandparents can make all the difference, because you never know what’s going to happen down the road.
Boys aren’t worth it:
So many guys are going to hurt you and break your heart, and you need to stop giving them 100 “second” chances. Life is going to get messy, and you’re going to meet the wrong people, so you need to know when enough is enough. You’re worth much more than a disrespectful boy that you won’t even talk to after high school, and the sooner you realize that the better. Also, keep in mind that boys aren’t everything, and you’re going to end up loving yourself so much more than you’ll love anyone else. That is far more meaningful and fulfilling.
Your body is beautiful:
Your struggle with self-love is going to be the largest struggle of your life and it will take a global pandemic for you to finally have the time to focus on yourself, but it’s going to be so worth it in the end. I know it’s easy to sit and compare yourself to other girls, but your body is so perfect the way it is, and you wouldn’t be truly happy if you became someone you weren’t. Finally wearing outfits that you’ve never dreamed of wearing before, embracing your naturally curly hair and officially being comfortable wearing no make up is going to feel so liberating and all the insecurities you’ve had are not going to matter as much anymore. You were so wonderfully made, and you’ll eventually get to the point of self-love, I promise!