There is no doubt the transition to college can be chaotic, stressful, and overall, emotionally draining. Everything is new, and the high school years are now behind you. For some, this may even include relationships from back home. Whether it is from distance or simply growing up, many are learning not only to cope with this new chapter of their lives, but to cope with recent breakups.
So…What do you do?
There’s no doubt that breakups are tough. Adding the crazy change of college to that does not make it any easier. Although your first few weeks on campus may feel lonely, you are most definitely not alone. There are many people going through similar struggles. Finding friends and getting involved will ease this feeling of loneliness you might have when starting off at MU. A great source for meeting new people on campus is through clubs…and boy does MU have clubs (over 600 if we are being exact)! College is the perfect place to meet new people that make you feel complete. With that being said, it takes time to form relationships. So, do not beat yourself up if you haven’t met your “future maid of honor” within the first couple of months of the school year. Finally, be patient with yourself. College is all about YOU and placing your personal well-being at the top of your priorities. Therefore, be kind to yourself.
How do I Stop Feeling Sad so I can Finally Enjoy College?
Everyone copes in different ways. Whether it was a relationship of 4+ years or a relationship of 3 months, heartbreak sucks! There is not an exact cure for the feeling one may have after being heartbroken. However, there are ways to ease the pain until you feel healed.
As I stated earlier, this experience is about you. Take time to learn about yourself at college. Learn what you love, try new foods, start doing yoga, join the Lettuce Eating Club on campus (yes, that is a thing), but mostly, try to find things that make you happy. Sometimes independence can get a little lost in relationships. For that reason, try to take this semester to build that relationship with YOU first. Doing activities that benefit your mental health can make you feel good from the inside out! Some of these may include:
- Painting/Drawing
- Working Out
- Reading
- Yoga/Meditation
- Hanging out with Friends
- Watching a comfort movie/show
- Journaling
- Going for a walk around Campus
- Listening to upbeat music
- Daily Affirmations
Although many of these ideas may sound somewhat mainstream, they are mainstream for a reason! They really do work! Doing these activities allows you to fill the empty time in your day, the time when you might feel a little down, and put your happiness first. This will allow you to build that self-love you might need in this time of heartbreak.
It is okay to Ask for Help
With all that being said, heartbreak can feel detrimental to some and that is totally okay. On top of having a ridiculous number of clubs, MU also has a variety of resources if you ever need someone to talk to. One of these resources is the MU Counseling Center. The Counseling Center is on the 4th Floor of Strickland Hall right next to the student center. The MU Counseling’s 24-hour number is available to anyone who needs to talk even in the latest hours of the night! Everyone is welcome no matter what challenges you might be facing. If anything, it is okay to just want to talk!
A Word of Advice
Coming into college, I am sure almost everyone imagined it to be instantly life-changing and almost “movie-like”. But, for many, this has not been the case. Emotional health struggles on top of a huge change in environment can be overwhelming. In addition to this, getting thrown into a huge campus where you do not know everyone can exacerbate the feeling of loneliness you might already be experiencing after a breakup. It is okay to not be okay. Breakups are difficult and not a quick fix. Time heals all wounds and even if this semester has not been ideal, forming new friendships and relationships take time. The college transition along with heartbreak is an unfair combination. However, it is a combination that anyone can survive, including you!