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Have you ever watched a movie or show and gone, “OMG, that is the worst boyfriend I have ever seen,” or “I hope I get a boyfriend like that someday?” Yeah… same. It’s kind of natural that we project ourselves onto the love interest — we’re trying to figure out what personalities we’re actually drawn to (strictly personality, not looks… well, mostly). And since there’s no shortage of fictional boyfriends out there, let’s dive in and see who deserves to set the standards and who we should leave behind in 2025.
First, Some Notable Boyfriends
When you think of traumatizing boyfriends, who comes to mind? Personally, I immediately think: Dean Forester from “Gilmore Girls,” Nate Cooper in “The Devil Wears Prada” and Billy Loomis from “Scream.” Yes, that’s a jump from an inconsiderate high school boyfriend to a full-on murderer, but you get the idea.
On the brighter side, raise your standards; we have the Hollywood sweethearts. My standouts? Noah Calhoun from “The Notebook,” Josh Lucas in “Clueless” and, my forever favorite, Patrick Verona from “10 Things I Hate About You,” which might be a controversial take because of the initial bribe, but character development, y’all. Now that you get the vibe, let’s actually break this down.
The Bad Eggs
First, the “mildly problematic but still maddening” boyfriends. Dean Forester (“Gilmore Girls”) and Diggie (“Liv and Maddie”) were just the ignorant, immature high school boyfriends that were, unfortunately, conventionally attractive and that just so happened to be the only thing going for them. Why were they “bad”? Simple: communication — aka none.
Dean hears Rory wants to go to Yale and basically says, “We’ll have to break up if you leave me to follow your dreams.” If that wasn’t bad enough, he later cheats on his wife with her… yeah, that’s a whole other essay. Diggie isn’t much better. He returns from fictional country Tundrabania only to announce he’s immediately leaving for Australia right before Maddie competes in the Junior Olympics. Chase your passions, sure, but maybe consider your girlfriend also. Between poor communication and general inconsideration, these boys will make you reconsider dating altogether. Now, onto the real offenders.
While those were just a mild degree of a “bad boyfriend,” let’s dig into the truly inexcusable boyfriends. Nate Cooper from “The Devil Wears Prada” and Jeremiah Fisher from “The Summer I Turned Pretty” take the cake for inexcusable behavior. Nate never cared that Andrea was slowly gaining “better style” through her employment under fashion icon Miranda Priestly. He was jealous of her success and how passionate she was becoming in her career. And unlike the high school boys, Nate is a full adult — no excuses.
Then there’s Jeremiah Fisher. If you watched the final season, chances are you’re Team Conrad by default. Jeremiah’s “pick-me” energy was simply too much. Between cheating on Belly, proposing as an apology, giving her the smallest ring known to mankind and guilt-tripping her out of studying abroad in Paris… It just never ends.
Regaining Faith in Men (in films only)
Deep breath. Time to remember the men written by women. Noah Calhoun from “The Notebook” is the gold standard. His love for Allie never fades, “I wrote you 365 letters, I wrote you every day for a year,” was his famous quote that stole the audience’s hearts. He restored their dream home and even cared for her after her Alzheimer’s set in. It’s emotional manipulation at its finest, and I’m here for it.
Then there’s Patrick Verona from “10 Things I Hate About You,” my personal favorite movie boyfriend of all time. Yes, the bribe at the beginning of their relationship is concerning, but Patrick doesn’t know Kat initially and there is no manipulation of an established emotional connection. Instead, you watch Patrick and Kat’s connection grow more and more with every scene. He shows up for her, listens to her and supports her. He even buys her a guitar. The man delivers. This movie I hold dear to my heart and no one can convince me otherwise – bias, maybe.
Now, Let’s Be Real
At the end of the day, these are all films, written, directed, produced and performed by professionals. Movie writers alike love showing women overcoming a bad relationship, finding peace in being alone or finding someone who exceeds every expectation. These male characters shouldn’t set your romantic standards, but they can remind you that you’re probably worth more than you give yourself credit for. So next time you wonder if you deserve better, imagine yourself as the main character of a coming-of-age series, figuring everything out. Because if Belly Conklin from “The Summer I Turned Pretty” can do it, so can you.