Having grown up in a military family and then becoming an out-of-state student, long distance friendships are nothing new to me. Throughout my childhood, I would move locations every two years and have to abandon any relationships that I was currently growing. I had to figure out ways to keep in contact with those I cherished and valued, lest we drift apart due to a lack of communication. To make my chronic habit of jumping ship seem more extreme, I am also an out-of-state student. Moving to Missouri after completing my high school degree in Texas, I was once again put in the same position that I had been in growing up. Luckily, I have many preestablished tools in my belt that I have gathered after many years of practice. Whether you have a long distance friend to keep in contact with from afar or are dreading the summer away from all your new college buddies, staying in contact can feel surprisingly daunting. If keeping in touch with high school friends is starting to feel like a drag, try out some of my tried and true methods for making the distance feel small.
1. Snail Mail
Having a pen pal is a great way to keep in touch with people who live farther away! The act of sending a letter or package is called snail mail because it takes a considerable amount of time to arrive. There is an expectation for constant communication in the modern age, and sending snail mail is a nice way to take a step back and go about things slower. You can send anything from a letter to trinkets that remind you of them. Personally, I met one of my best friends when I lived in England, and we are still pen pals to this day. Now that I am in college, I exchange letters with many of my friends from home.
2. Weekly Photodumps
If you are not able to text or keep in contact with your friends every day, that’s OK! You can take photos of your day and have fun documentation of what you are up to, and then you guys can swap photos! The frequency of the exchange, as well as the number of photos that are dumped, is completely up to you. It is an excellent way to keep each other updated without having to be in consistent contact.
3. Scheduled — or Not — Calls
This may seem obvious, but another good way to keep a relationship going strong is to call each other. Having a scheduled time and date to call and talk is helpful but not necessarily essential. If you have a free second and they are also free, give them a call! Even if you are just able to catch up for a few minutes, a little goes a long way in maintaining your friendships. You can also check in while doing something else, like giving your friend a ring while you walk the track or are on a grocery run.
4. Voice Memos and Vlogs
Neither of you is free to call? No problem! If you have a funny story to tell or want to take a minute and rant about age-old issues, press that button and record a message. Your friend can listen and respond whenever they get the chance. Additionally, and similar to the weekly photodumps, you can record mini vlogs for your friend to watch! My friend and I record clips of our adventures when we go on trips, compile them into a video and share them with each other. It is a great way to see their life without actually having to be there.
5. Daily challenges
Community and shared experiences are great ways to form connections and keep relationships strong. The chosen activities can vary widely, but it can be anything you both want to do together, even if it’s virtual. My personal recommendation is to complete the daily Wordle or crossword puzzle and then share your stats. You could do a color challenge and send each other photos every time you see a certain color in the wild throughout your day. The opportunities and ideas are endless! It is just another way to check in and think of each other daily.
6. Designated Hang Out Time
It is a general consensus that a person should enjoy hanging out with their friends. If you can’t hang out in person, there are plenty of things to do together, even if separated by distance. A great example would be to pick a day of the week to watch a movie together. I also enjoy staying on call with my friends while we both complete our own individual tasks, like homework or laundry. Think of things you would normally do in person and just do them virtually!
7. Start a Newsletter
This one is a little more adventurous but no less fun. It can be difficult to keep in contact and up to date with all of your friends, especially if you all live in different places. An easy way to update everyone is to write down what you have been up to and post your life updates in an online newsletter. You could also mail your newsletter to people, but an online alternative may be easier and cheaper in the long term. You can post however often you like, whether it is weekly or monthly, but it is an excellent way to keep in touch. They could also make one, and it would become similar to a shared forum. This way, you and all of your friends can be updated on each other’s lives at a guaranteed time and all at once.
Whether you choose to try out one or all of these, I hope these activities can be as useful to you as they have been in my personal life. These tips can also be applied to any form of relationship! Whether it is romantic or platonic, long-distance or close, having planned interactions and forms of contact are endlessly helpful. So before you stress about keeping in contact with your old friends or making new ones, try out one of these seven tasks with your chosen person, and hopefully your relationship will be just a little bit stronger.