Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
ferdinand stohr NFs6dRTBgaM unsplash?width=719&height=464&fit=crop&auto=webp
ferdinand stohr NFs6dRTBgaM unsplash?width=398&height=256&fit=crop&auto=webp
/ Unsplash
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Maryland chapter.

I am an internationl Indonesian student who lived in Singapore for high school and now going to college in America. With that being said, here is a poem that expresses what it means to be all those things.

To those who live in my motherland:

Photo by Falaq Lazuardi on Unsplash

At first glance they look at me with scathing eyes

Why, I don’t even know you

All I know is that

we speak the same mother tongue

we grew up on the same soil

we hear the song of our country

so why is it, when you don’t know me, you judge me

because I don’t look like you?

Sift through documentation, passports, birth certificates

Nationality — Indonesian

we belong to one nation

we both say

Indonesia tanah airku

Indonesia kebangsaanku,

Bangsa dan tanah airku

Now say why you exile this part of you

To the two who gave me life:

Photo by Alberto Casetta on Unsplash

At first glance they look into me with loving eyes

why, I am half of you

grown in your womb, raised in your arms

we live under the same roof

we eat on the same table

we stay together through all the slammed doors, late nights, and eye rolls

so why is it that through all the love, the joy, the care,

those arms that have congratulated me with embrace

Point, shove slap,

turning against you when you say


Those arms cross, their backs turn away from you

disappointed, ashamed

As I chose different path, and stray from the one that was carved out for me,

I am at a crossroad between loyalty and passion

But that doesn’t matter because you two only see that it’s the end

So, tell me why, you can’t accept this half that is you

Say why you shun this part of you

To my one self:

Photo by Gursimrat Ganda on Unsplash

At first glance, I see a young girl

why, I am whole

conceiving my own thoughts

following my own aspirations

growing to be who I want to be

thriving in the life I live

I am a puzzle in the making:

with my parents

my country

as an outline

I want to find out what fits inside on my own

so no matter how they

exile, shun, disregard me

I know that all the parts of me will become whole

Audrey graduated from the University of Maryland College Park with a major in Broadcast Journalism and a minor in Information Sciences. She was born and raised in Jakarta, Indonesia. She loves to travel around the world and always has her camera ready to capture everything so follow her on Instagram @audreynwid. Her life motto is 'Don't be afraid to defy the auds, pun intended.' Her furry partner in crime is a Shiba Inu named Hibiki who is quite the model and loves to go hiking. Check him out on Instagram @hibibblekiki
Maryam Pitt

Maryland '18