Dating. This word is fairly short in length yet it packs a punch and it can mean pretty much anything. To me, it means “complete waste of my damn time.” Not because I am some cynical monster who is so completely removed from society that I can’t recognize the benefits that come from dating, but because I find it tedious, boring, and just a little scary.
One major reason to dislike dating is that it can be overly complicated. Like, does it mean we’re just casually seeing each other, or are we exclusive? How many dates do we go on before one of us asks the “what are we” question? How do I know we’re actually dating and not just “hanging out”? Or my personal favourite, “Are we dating or am I just your Uni Mom?”. Ultimately, you can try to ask these questions but the chances of getting ghosted increases with every poke and prod. Then again, who cares right? If your person of interest can’t communicate openly, why bother dating them in the first place?
During my time at university, I’ve experienced so many new things: I’ve lived with friends and complete strangers, taken public transportation by myself, and danced the night away at a club, just to name a few. I found my university had so many things to offer that I didn’t want to worry about dating. I wanted to excel in my classes and join as many clubs as I could fit into my schedule.
Now, when I say dating is a waste of my time, I also mean dating apps are a waste of my time. Have I tried dating apps? Yes! Did I think they were terrible? Yes! Have I had some really bad experiences with some not-so-nice people? Of course! Every time I download a dating app and start swiping, I feel as if I’m cheating myself out of having a real-life interaction and making meaningful connections. Anyone else? I can now officially say that I am done with dating apps because as awkward as it is to talk to someone IRL, it is so much better! I’ve made some of my current BFFs just by cracking a lame opening line and shooting some finger guns. A total Meghan move.
Despite not dating in post-secondary, I don’t feel like I’ve missed out on something great. In fact, I think by staying single, I’ve managed to live the best version of my life. I’ve become active in my school community and I feel like everywhere I go I find myself saying “hey” to at least three people. Go me! I know my school is small, but as someone who went through high school relatively unnoticed, this is huge! I’ve stepped up my fashion game, I’ve taken risks, and I’m even able to say “no” when I feel like it, which is a win for me!
Also, seeing your BFFs break up with their SOs is SAD AF. I feel for them, really, but I also know I have cleverly avoided romantic heartbreak because I just don’t date. Have I had my heart broken? Of course! But it’s never because of a romance gone awry. I have had people close to me pass away and I have had to break up with friends and cut people out of my life like a child doing arts and crafts, but not once have I ever shed a tear over a love interest in the story of Meghan.
Now, I may be single, but I am certainly not alone! I have plenty of friends to keep me company and I certainly have too many extra-curriculars on my plate.
Bottom line – dating in university is a waste of time. It’s just way too complicated! There are too many rules, taboos and grey areas. Use this time to find yourself! Be that strong, independent human being we know you are.
As much as I hate to do this, I’m totally signing off with a quote from the one and only, Carrie Bradshaw:
“The most exciting, challenging, and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself.”