Bittersweet

You said no one could make you laugh 

the way I did. 

But there you sit 

in the coffeehouse my sister works at, 

laughing with someone else

as if I were the one across from you. 

 

We fell apart when we should’ve been falling in love.

Uncertainty awakening our broken hearts, 

trying to fill in a perfect painting 

with brushes that had already dried up. 

 

Ruined and helpless, 

I tried to reach out to you,

but then I heard that 

you were out with her, 

and I was too afraid to. 

 

Too afraid of the words you’d speak that 

would take the air from my lungs and 

leave me with nothing inside of my soul, but 

your voice would be so warm that 

I would take your rejection as a compliment. 

 

As you sip your mocha latte with someone from class, 

claiming to need a tutor in chemistry, even though 

you’ve had straight A’s since kindergarten, 

I will stand in the shadows, missing you,  

longing for you, 

loving you. 

 

My feelings for you will forever remain 

like tear-stained pages in your favorite book of poetry, 

a constant reminder of what was and 

what could have been. 

 

And what will always be.