Seventeen days from now, I will be on a plane to England. I will have packed and repacked my bags. I will have hugged my (probably crying) mom goodbye. And I will be on my way to a different continent, where I will live for almost six months. It seems crazy, when you think about it like that. “Oh, I’m studying abroad in London” sounds much more cavalier than “I am going to live in a country that I mostly know about through Downton Abbey and Harry Potter.” As I get closer and closer to my departure date, I get more and more nervous.
Now, if you know me at all, you probably know that I’m a very nervous person in general. So it should be no surprise that this adventure has my worrying at full force. I’m excited. Of course I’m excited. But I’m also terrified. Ranting might help get that out of my system, so here is a list of things that have given me the pre-abroad jitters!
Friends
During a panel about study abroad, the only advice about making friends was “Put yourself out there! Just go up to people and strike up a conversation! Take risks!”
Those aren’t exactly my strong suits. I have four close friends on this campus, and three of them lived within 15 feet of me freshman year. I’m not exactly known for my eloquent ability to break awkward silences or chat with strangers.
I’ve been told I’m much more extroverted than I feel, especially when I’m nervous, so hopefully that will play to my advantage. Because who knows how I’d make it through six months abroad without making friends.
Safety
Pretty self-explanatory. Pickpocketing and scams are a thing. Terrorists are a thing. Women not being able to walk places alone is a thing. I mean, all of those things happen in the United States too, but it does feel a lot more precarious when I’m far away from home.
Packing
I’m used to driving to school before the beginning of each semester and loading my mom’s car so full you couldn’t fit another teacup. In contrast, my study abroad program recommends bringing “a carry-on and one small suitcase.” Quite the difference between those two methods of packing.
I fully realize that I bring way more stuff to school than I need. I am a chronic over-packer, and it’s a problem every time I go on a trip. But, seriously? A carry on and a small suitcase for 5 ½ months’ worth of stuff? That’s asking a lot.
Internet
I wrote a whole article last week about how much I love having Internet and cell service. That’s a bit harder to come by in a different country. Yes, I realize I’m going to London, which is by all definitions a modern, technological city. I’ll almost definitely have wifi in my apartment (thank god). But texting and navigating and figuring anything out on the go? Yikes.
Not to even mention communicating with people back at home, who will be five to eight time zones away.
Getting Lost. A Lot.
My inability to navigate is one of my defining characteristics. I once lived in a town of 6,500 people and still somehow got lost. My mom had to draw me a map so I could find the post office.
So now imagine taking that person and dropping her in a city of almost 14 million people, giving her a map of the underground, and telling her to get around. And considering the fact I plan to travel fairly extensively outside the city/country… Yeah. It’s not going to go well. I will get lost. I will end up on the wrong train, on the wrong end of the city, and late for something. And I won’t even have a GPS to help me figure it out.
I just keep telling myself it’ll be an adventure, that maybe my absolutely terrible navigation skills will mean I’ll discover something new and unexpected and amazing. Or maybe it’ll just mean I’m even more thankful I picked a country where they speak English.
I fully realize this just sounds like a bunch of whining. I will be the first to admit that this is whining. I’m not saying that I’m not excited. I’m so excited that I can barely stand it. I’m going to be living in London for almost six months! And, one of my classes is literally just visiting a different museum every week. I have a month of spring break. It’s going to be amazing.
But I also have some very real fears and worries, and I think we need to acknowledge that. Yes, study abroad is an absolutely incredible experience. But it’s also scary and nerve-wracking. Pros always come with cons.
So here’s to my trip. To learning and trying new things. To seeing sights I’ve dreamed of since I was little. To getting lost. To having an adventure like I can’t even imagine.
Photos: Uniplaces Blog, Architectural Digest, Queen Mary University of London