Neo Yokio. My Lord. Where do I start?
Yes, the Toblerone is real. Now what?
By now I’ve established myself as the critic of bad things. Death Note, Suicide Squad, Fifty Shades… I will say that it is very easy to write a bad review rather than a good one. It’s easy to make a bad movie, and it’s easier to lambast said bad movie.
One thing that makes bad movies hard to review is when they are so inept, so fundamentally awful, that they go from bad to brilliant. Take The Room for example. The Room is a truly bad movie in all aspects except for production (it actually passes as a movie… I’m looking at you, Birdemic). It’s one of my favorite movies, because it’s so bad it’s funny. It’s memorable, it’s oddly charming, and it’s actually sort of inspiring.
People can universally agree that Tommy Wiseau’s magnum opus is truly awful. I’ve always thought of writing a review for The Room, but everything I’ve ever wanted to say has already been said.I don’t really have an opinion to give that’s any different than anyone else’s. I don’t have anything new to say about The Room.
I might, however, have something new to say about Neo Yokio, Netflix’s newest anime.
There is a lot going on in this show that makes it very hard to follow. So let’s start with the main characters (and their impressive voice actors).
Kaz Kaan is Jaden Smith’s twitter, played by Jaden Smith. I’m not kidding. The voice actor is Jaden Smith. It’s so right and so wrong at the same time. Jaden’s voice is really flat and monotone, and it almost works.
Charles is Kaz’s…. robo butler. He flies. I really don’t know what else to say here, but there’s more to the character… And the voice is Jude Law.
Helena St. Tessoro is the premier fashion blogger of the city. She is kinda boring (potentially because her voice is more monotone than Kaz’s), but at least she’s good at calling Kaz out on his bullshit. She also has three loyal followers dubbed “The Helenists,” one of which is voiced by Willow Smith, my personal favorite of the Smith family. I thought the choice for Helena’s voice actor was a bit too spot on: Tavi Gevinson, founder of Style Rookie. She is literally the premiere fashion blogger
Agatha is Kaz’s aunt, and also his supervisor. She gives no fucks, and is primarily motivated by money. She is, however, a good worker and very serious about her role as a “magistocrat.” Agatha is voiced by Susan Sarandon (Damn).
Lexy and Gottlieb are Kaz’s stereotypical Upper West Side New York friends. I really like these two, they’re less mopey, Jaden Smith-y versions of Kaz’s character. Their voice actors are Desus and Mero, which explains why these two characters have good chemistry with each other.
Arcangelo is a stereotypical Upper East Side rich snob. He constantly competes against Kaz and makes fun of him for being “nouveau riche.” I know a lot of Arcangelos. The voice actor is Jason Schwartzman… which I thought was strange until I saw that Jason Schwartzman is in several Wes Anderson movies. Then it seemed appropriate: nothing is more pretentious than talking about Wes Anderson.
Side characters include, but are not limited to: A vaping asshole dressed like a judge, A creepy nude fisherman, a Soviet F1 driver, a GIANT Toblerone bar, John DiMaggio, a high school professor, a Bergdorf’s salesman, and a tiny mean woman who lives inside of Charles. Pretty typical.
It seems like the roles were written around the voice actors. Susan Sarandon playing a tough bitch? Check. Jaden Smith playing pink haired Jaden Smith? Too easy. Stephen Fry as a sassy professor? Done!
Oh! And Steve Buscemi? He’d do perfectly as that vaping asshole I was talking about!
Maybe not that last one, but the other examples still work. And because the characters in the show don’t really have much character, the voice acting really suffers.
The setting of this show is the “mythical” area of Neo Yokio.
Why do I put quotes around “mythical”? Because Neo Yokio has Burroughs like NYC, fashion like NYC, and stupid NYC elitism like NYC. So if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck…
This is definitely a great part of this show: the parody of city life is really funny; there is a difference between the Upper East and West Side (two of the wealthiest districts in both the show and in actuality) and the characters from each borough are accurate stereotypes.
What I don’t get is why some city names are fake and some are real. One character, a singer named Sailor Pellegrino (sigh), comes from North Cacalaca (No, I did not fall asleep on my keyboard, that’s it’s name). Also, in this fake universe, the U.S.S.R. is still a thing. BUT, AT THE SAME TIME, the entire state of New Jersey exists in the show! Potentially the real state of New Jersey isn’t important enough to get it’s own fake name in Neo Yokio (in before anyone else can make a Jersey joke), but it’s not the only place that exists in both the show and real life; Kaz, Lexy, and Gottlieb all go to the Hamptons! What?
The show makes a lot of references to other anime and TV shows.
The aforementioned episode that takes place in the Hamptons is heavily inspired by Ranma. Kaz Kaan fights with Dragonball type energy balls. Even the name “Neo Yokio” is similar to “Neo-Tokyo” from Akira. There are several references devoted to Sailor Moon… and one could even say Neo Yokio’s poorly done animation is in direct homage to Scooby Doo.
They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but it seems to me like a cop-out. I wasn’t too into this. I wanted the show to be crazy for itself.
Now, let’s talk about… THE PLOT.
I will say that the plot is very hard to nail down. Is this show a commentary about fashion and the struggles of metrosexuality? Is this show about love and loss? Is this show a parody of rich kids from Upper East and West Side New York? Is this a show about exorcisms?
Er… Yes.
There is no main plot, rather a collection of subplots mashed together. For example:
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Kaz Kaan wants to be the most eligible bachelor in all of Neo Yokio. Arcangelo also wants to be on the top of this list, so the two characters become rivals.
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Kaz Kaan is a metrosexual and goes on a journey of self-discovery through the world of fashion.
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Kaz Kaan hunts demons sometimes.
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Kaz Kaan plays field hockey.
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Kaz Kaan becomes a bodyguard to a race car driver.
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Kaz Kaan becomes a race car driver.
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Kaz Kaan gets freaked out about being seen in a midnight blue suit before the black and white party.
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Kaz Kaan goes to Bergdorf’s sometimes.
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Kaz Kaan attempts to smuggle a terrorist in a Louis Vuitton Speedy bag across the Holland Tunnel.
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Kaz Kaan pretends to date Lexy (who had become female) to make his ex jealous.
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Kaz Kaan attempts to give Helena a giant Toblerone. She doesn’t deserve it.
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I rip my hair out in confusion. Or maybe that was just me.
There’s just too much going on for this to be a real anime.
To summarize it: it’s exhausting, confusing, all over the place, poorly voiced, and badly animated. It’s barely an anime. It’s barely a show.
AND I FUCKING LOVED IT.
This show is The Room for me. It’s so inept it’s charming and hilarious. It’s a lot like the YouTube Abridged series that TeamFourStar puts out. I don’t really think this show is meant to be crazy and bad on purpose, but it is, and that’s what makes it fun. We did not deserve this giant Toblerone of a show.
You’ve already heard my rant about Netflix originals. Long story short, they’re very very hit or miss. Neo Yokio has completely blown that idea out of the water. I both want more and want it to end.
I really recommend watching this anime. I also recommend reading reviews about it, because they are as funny as the show. Here are some ways other people described Neo Yokio:
“‘Neo Yokio’ Is Like If Wes Anderson Made an Anime Series.”
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Inverse Entertainment
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Gigguk, The Anime Zone
“Neo Yokio is a bad, attempted homage to Jaden Smith’s strange Twitter persona.”
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Polygon
Neo Yokio is an Absolutely Mesmerizing Train Wreck
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Geek.com
Image Credit: Feature, 1, 2, 3, 5, 6, Netflix