People always call themselves either “a cat-person” or “a dog-person.” It’s one of those societal categories we place on ourselves that says as much about you as if you were calling yourself “a democrat,” “a vegetarian,” or “a Taylor Swift fan.” Being a cat or a dog person is neither good, nor bad, but it tells the world how you see yourself. As someone who grew up in the age of the Internet, I probably view this distinction with more gravity than the average human being. Thus, I have decided to consider the classic “Cats vs. Dogs” crisis, and what it means to be either.
Before I dive into my epistemological debate over pet mentality, let me supply a little historical background: I grew up with dogs. I have only ever owned dogs, and I LOVE them to an almost absurd degree, and yet… the Internet has made me a little more than obsessed with the cosmic force that is cats, and cat gifs, and cat humor, and the realm of cat-internet culture.
Cats speak to me on a deep, almost religious level. They understand my need to constantly be cuddled, to go places not meant to be treaded, to pretend the rules don’t apply to me, to curl up in a nest of blankets and sweaters, to lay on the rug in the exact spot the sun has warmed, and my absolute need for a substantially large amount of affection at any given time.
Basically, I devolve into a cat on the daily… but does that make me a cat person? Dogs supply a singular and unique adorable “run-into-the-screen-door-because-I-forgot-it-was-there” breed of devotion. Because I’ve only ever owned dogs (and fish, but we don’t talk about the fish). I grew up with two positively adorable golden retrievers, named Bear and Murphy. They were “married,” and had seven puppies; they had their own family and were part of our family. I’m deeply invested in dogs. Here are a few other reasons why dogs are amazing:
They will cuddle me as much as I need, whenever I need it!
Dogs like to be active and get outside with you…
They always want to eat your leftovers (even when they’re vegan!)…
They never say no to a good petting (unlike those uppity cats)…
They stay in bed with you when you’re sick…
Ultimately, they don’t hide for hours, they don’t refuse to love you because of their own hidden agenda, they never scratch you for no reason and they don’t slip outside the door with the intention of never returning because they could care less which apartment complex you live in, as long as there is milk and a human to bend their will. Dogs fill in all the gaps that a cat would inevitably leave behind. Some part of my subconscious knows the simple solution is to own both a cat and a dog, but I don’t want the cat to gang up on the dog and become a classic case on inherent cat-on-dog bullying.
Dogs already know to follow me around, love me unconditionally and put up with my annoying habits like sing-narrating my life, having a panic attack over a spider the size of a dime, crying over stubbing toe, constantly needing color-coded organization and the weekly cry session with my tribe of favorite girls. A cat could never handle me, a cat is too worried about its own concerns. Dogs selflessly devote themselves to their owners and remind them – meaning, me – to be less self-involved. Maybe I need a dog to balance me out.
Verdict: I’m a cat-like person, and thus I need a dog. I love cats, but I would have the most unhealthy love-hate relationship with them. We need to pick the pets (and the people), we need in our lives, not necessarily the ones we desire most.
Image Sources: Tumblr.com, Catsdogsblog.com, Media.giphy.com, Lolzgif.com, Barkpost.com,