I Never Want Kids

I do not like babies. I never have either. To me, babies are kind of disgusting and way too loud for my liking. When I tell people this, they tend to tell me that I will grow out of it, or that having my own would change that,

I am 22 years old. I do not think I will change my opinion on this. I just do not have motherly instincts of any kind. 

Babysitting kids is one thing. I can handle little kids for a few hours, but the idea of raising one for years sounds daunting. I'd rather focus on my career, or be able to use my money towards other things. I always felt selfish for this, but I think a lot of other women might feel this way.

I think my biggest fear is the idea that “my children” could grow up to have similar mental illnesses as me or grow to resent me. I feel like my lack of motherly instincts would make me way too distant to be a good mother. It just would not be fair to have kids.

I know my boyfriend would like to have a child one day, but after some discussion, he told me it was my choice in the end. This has also made me feel guilty. I know he loves me, but why would he be so willing to give up something he wants?

Maybe one day my opinion on children will change like people have told me. On the other hand, maybe I will always dislike babies. I feel terrible for every other woman who has been forced to feel like they need to be a mother one day. It is no one else’s business. 

To all of the women out there who are mothers or want to be one, I applaud you. It is a hard and exhausting job. Not everyone can do it and not everyone should. 

I do not know what my future holds, but one thing will always be certain for me. Babies are all a little bit gross.