I really only have one memory of my parents when they were together (and happy).
My siblings and I were playing in the game room of our old house and my dad had just gotten home from work. At this point, I was blissfully unaware of what divorce was. I assumed all parents loved each other and that marriage was something that bound two people together forever – or so I was told. My dad kissed my mom, which earned a choir of gags and the word, “Ew!” from me and my siblings. I was probably around the age of 5.
From then on, things went downhill. Fights behind closed doors became a regular occurrence and confusion set in as we moved to our new house. I still must have been pretty clueless at this point. I was just basking in the fact that I got my own room and that we had a giant pool at our new house.
Things seemed good for a while. And I know that my parents tried their best to work things out, but some people are just better off apart. I remember the “family meeting” where my parents announced their divorce and crying out of shock and confusion. I didn’t understand.
My dad kept the house and mom got her own place that we eventually moved into. We started a routine where we’d stay with my mom during the weekdays and our dad would see us on the weekends. I can’t lie and say it was easy, because really it was the farthest thing from it. Packing a bag every single week to go back and forth became exhausting and half the time I never even unpacked.
“Which house are you at? Mom’s or Dad’s?” became usual questions when hanging out with friends. And don’t even get me started on holidays. It’s a constant battle that I’m sure I’ll have to deal with for the rest of my life. But things aren’t all bad.
I still have two parents who love me to death and would do anything for me. And fortunately, they gave me two siblings who I can count on no matter what. Sure, having divorced parents sucks, but I would rather them be happy than stay in a marriage that wasn’t working. I’ve learned a lot from growing up the way I did and for that I’m grateful. I wouldn’t have wanted my life to be any other way.