Have you ever lost something that was never yours? It hurts all the same. You are missing out on the possibility of the future. What if things worked out? And they are thinking “what if it does not?” You would not even try? You see him every day, you laugh at all of his dumbass jokes, you let him hug you, and kiss you. You text him everyday and wait patiently for a reply that is not coming. You put yourself on the back burner and continue to pray for something you know is not going to happen. You watch him flirt with other girls, and ignore your presence. You cry and he knows it is because of him but he does not care. Yet, still, you hold out hope. For what? He will never want you the way you want him. At some point, you have to value yourself over their opinion of you. You have to matter more to yourself. You just have to. He knew what he was doing. He knew exactly what was going to happen when he let you down and he did it anyway. His actions are not your responsibility.
I know being told to just ”get over it” is easier than actually doing it, but you have to try, you have to move on. Do not hold on to that hope, do not find pieces of him to hold onto, do not hold on to the good moments, you have to let it all go. He hurt you. Intentionally or not, he did it. He knew this was going to happen and he did it anyway. “Don’t waste your tears on him” is a bunch of crap. Cry all you want to. You are allowed to be hurt. You are allowed to feel disappointed, you are allowed to feel let down. You are allowed to feel, but do not question yourself. Do not doubt yourself or your worth. His actions have nothing to do with you.
Everything he did is his responsibility and his responsibility alone. You do not always have to take the blame when other people hurt you. That is not your burden to carry. He did it to you, whatever it was in your case he did, and that is not your fault. Those “almost” relationships really get to me personally. They string us along, waste our time, we end up hurt, and they end up fine. Why is that? Why do they always get off free and we do not? Why do we have to suffer through the pain someone who is not worth it caused? Do not let it get to you. It is his own fault and he is missing out on the greatest person he could even ever know. You are a goddess, and someone out there is going to take you seriously. Someone out there is going to treat you the way you deserve.