Why Some Honesty Shouldn’t Be Shared

“I just keep it real.” “I’m sorry, I’m just being honest.” “Sorry you can’t handle the truth.” When are we finally going to realize that there are going to be negative reactions to all of these statements? When are we going to stop using being “honest” as an excuse for being a dick? Does being honest make some statements that we say to each other okay? No, it doesn’t. Some of your honesty should not be shared. In some cases, the saying “if you’re not going to say something nice, don’t say anything at all” is valid.

            Here’s the harsh truth. Here’s MY honesty. And I’ll share it. The most undermined form of assault can arguably be verbal assault. If you’re reading this, you’re probably in college, you’re probably recently graduated, or you’re probably an adult with a full-time job. But I can openly say that we are getting way too old to be putting each other down as humans. It seems to be our favorite excuse to say what we need to say. Not everything needs to be shared, especially if you know what you’re about to say is going to be detrimental to that person’s emotional state. We’re 18 years old and beyond, yet I am still witnessing, both directly and indirectly, situations where others are bullying each other as if we’re in different cliques in middle school. We may be “adults”, but we still have feelings. To think that everyone has their own story and that everyone has built their own layers, and some have thicker skin than others just proves that no one has any idea what another person is going through or has gone through. People have triggers, people have emotions, some people won’t take your bullying, and some people simply just can’t. It’s no one’s job to push people to their limits. I understand people using “honesty” as a defense mechanism, but there are truly times when being too truthful when it was not necessary could be someone’s downfall. It’s something really easy to miss, but something so important.

           “Quit being dramatic.” “I know you like the attention but calm down.” What’s the point of telling someone to “stop being dramatic” when they’re expressing how they feel? There really is nothing healthy with suppressing your feelings, so why should they calm down? That’s another harsh truth; before you think someone is just being dramatic, understand that maybe that’s just because they’re feeling a certain emotion to its highest capacity. If they’re upset, something happened that made them genuinely upset. If they’re overly ecstatic, good! We need more of that in the world. Why should we consider being “dramatic” such a bad thing? At least we’re feeling something.

            “Just because something should be said, does not mean it should be heard.”

            I know this is more of a rant than anything, but I can’t begin to explain how important it is to treat everyone with the upmost respect. We live in a world where the way we treat one another can become so toxic and the interpersonal relationships we build with others are what give us levels of growth. I, personally, do not want that growth to be stunted.

            Respect each other’s feelings. You don't know how powerful words can be.

            Xoxo, Dav