For some, February 14th is a day for worshipping at the altar of romantic love – for others, a drinking holiday. If you don’t have a special someone this year, it can be especially difficult navigating both digital and physical communities as they express sentiments of joy, love, and eros, while you’re thinking about all the ways you’ve been dumped or rejected. Rather than wallow in the pity or hatred of such a mushy holiday, use this Valentine’s Day to celebrate what this holiday is really about – LOVE!!! Just because you don’t have a partner doesn’t mean you can’t feel the love, it just means you have to do so in ways that are a little more creative.
This list will provide you with ideas for celebrating the other forms of love that are integral to our lives that we tend to forget about. Whether it’s for yourself, your friends and family, or your community, follow these suggestions to make this Valentine’s Day extra special, even if you’re single.
Rally the troops for a GAlentine’s Party
It’s time for a girl’s night! Grab your friends for a night to celebrate some of the most devoted relationships in your life. You can enjoy a night out in coordinating outfits a la Halloweekend, or enjoy a slower night in by crafting friendship bracelets, painting, or simply enjoying a movie or reality TV! Bonus, turn it into a dinner party or a wine and cheese night! Have each gal pal bring a dish, drink, or appetizer, and transform your evening into an indulgent celebration of life, love, and womanly affection.
I recommend this one if you’re out of a relationship recently, or feeling pretty socially disconnected. Getting back in touch with a group of people who love and support you is a great way to add some joy back into your life on a day that can trudge up some gloomy feelings.
Cozy up, stay in, and enjoy a self-care night
This is for my introverts! If you aren’t up for a bold and beautiful night to celebrate the girls, then this is the year to celebrate some self-love. Pick up a facemask, your favorite drink, and a pint of ice cream, because it’s time for a night of pampering. Take an everything shower, (or – dare I say – a bubble bath!) cozy up with your favorite PJs, and enjoy a night in doing whatever it is you love best. Read a book, watch a movie or TV show (or multiple, I’m not judging!), and take the night to relax from the stresses of daily life by celebrating the wonderful, lovely person that you are!
Love Thy NEighbor: volunteer in your community!
Sometimes, the best way we can love ourselves is by loving others. During times when I’m personally struggling with how to love life, going out into my community, volunteering for causes I value, and making a difference in people’s lives helps me as much as it helps them. Instead of focusing on showing so much love for the people we already hold dear, maybe this year it’s time to practice the ways we can love strangers. Check with your local food pantries, homeless shelters, and other mutual aid funds to see what you can do to support their efforts and engage in meaningful, transformative, and loving work!
Take yourself out for a solo date
Feeling confident this year? Maybe a little… competitive? If you got out of a relationship and want to prove you won the breakup, it may be time to dress like the hottie you are and strut yourself out on the town – blissfully single! Celebrate yourself by taking a seat at your favorite bar or restaurant, bring a book or a compact hobby you enjoy, and luxuriate in the lovely little treat that you are! Rather than doomscrolling or getting angry about what your ex-partners or friends are doing, take a risk and go out – be seen as the gorgeous, capable, and confident bombshell that you are!
It can be really uncomfortable to go have dinner or drinks alone as if you have exposed yourself to the world awaiting judgment. However, once you get over the hump of your own fears, it can be incredibly empowering to take up space with your own company!
Spread the Love (and support your Mail Carriers!)
One of my favorite teachers in High School used to always tell me, “There is nothing more powerful than a hand-written letter!” While I think this is somewhat hyperbolic, there’s certainly some truth to it! Taking the time to write some kind words to send to the people you love not only expresses your affection, but you’re also creating an artifact that your loved ones can return to again and again for years to come. Whether you write a letter on notebook paper or DIY a card, celebrate the non-romantic forms of love by making valentines for your friends and family! Bonus: mail that to your favorite people back home so that they get the joys of opening your lovely little letter WHILE you support the work of our postal service!
Whether you love Valentine’s Day or the day’s approach fills you with dread and discomfort, I hope just one of these activities helps you to feel and express all the different forms of love that we depend on each day. By testing out these suggestions you get to replace the ugly or pessimistic memories of Valentine’s Day with peace, love, and empowerment!