Valentine’s Day is one of the many holidays that has fallen victim to the plague of over-commercialization. When we think of Valentine’s Day, the first things that come to mind are cheesy heart-shaped candy boxes, teddy bears, and the pressure to buy your significant other THE perfect gift (queue all the TikToks titled “What your Boyfriend REALLY Wants for Valentines Day”). It is important to set aside the holiday’s capitalistic and social implications in order to focus on its true objective: the celebration of love.
Love is a potent force that manifests itself in all types of relationships whether they be romantic, platonic, or familial. Chances are, you regularly think of ways to demonstrate your love to loved ones. If you don’t, you can easily find Valentines-themed articles offering advice on how to display your love through grand, romantic gestures. However, this is not such an article. Love is not merely relational. Love can be applied to just about anything, including yourself. Yes, on this holiday notorious for relationships and “galentine’s” propaganda, I am urging you to take some time for yourself. This is why I have compiled a list of ten different ways to show yourself love on Valentines Day, or any day, for that matter.
- Enjoy the little things
Okay, okay. I know everyone says this but it’s a cliche for a reason. The truth is, life is mundane sometimes and that’s okay. It’s not everyday that you’re skydiving or scuba diving (I don’t know, just throwing out random examples of exciting activities). Life is what you make of it. I know this word has been beaten to death by the media but there is some merit to the whole “romanticization” trend. Making your morning coffee, studying in the library, eating lunch with your friends…these things can all be fun. For me, romanticizing my life is all about crafting a master playlist. The right soundtrack can elevate any day. Also, there’s something to be said about letting yourself live in the moment. Yes, I know I am speaking exclusively in cliche sayings but bear with me please. Letting yourself enjoy moments means momentarily distancing yourself from the future. Shake your assignments and the impending Sunday scaries from your mind. What’s the point of working hard if you don’t allow yourself to enjoy the moments you work so hard for? Adopting this mentality is game-changing.
- Treat yourself to little “luxuries”
Just to clarify, I am not talking about treating yourself to a Birkin bag or a five-star-resort vacation. If you do, that is entirely your prerogative and honestly, good for you for having the money to do that. The luxuries I am referring to are of a much smaller scale. Allow me to give an example. This semester, I am trying my absolute best to avoid spending money on coffee every single day. So far, I have been fairly habitual about making my coffee in my dorm. HOWEVER, in order to satiate my cravings for an unnecessarily expensive latte, I allow myself to buy a venti brown sugar oat milk shaken espresso every Friday before class. I am not even the type of person to buy venti drinks but on Fridays, I do it for the added luxury. I genuinely look forward to this treat all week. It’s proof that the littlest things can bring us happiness. I urge you to try this strategy and allow yourself to do unnecessary, extravagant things every once in a while. Give a concert while taking a long, luxurious hot shower or make yourself a ridiculous ice cream sundae at Kimball with all your favorite toppings. Why deprive yourself? Enjoy the silly little things that bring you joy.
- Find pockets of peace
If I am being fully honest, I normally dread going back to school after break. It’s not that I don’t love my life here because I do. I am deeply passionate about what I am studying, I love my friends and my cozy little dorm room, yet for some reason the prospect of returning drains me. It wasn’t until recently that I discovered the reason why: I never allow myself to relax at school. Whether it’s socializing, doing work or pretending to be dialed-in at Cool Beans, I always feel like there is something productive to be doing. Why is it that at home I don’t feel guilty about lounging around the house all day and binge reading a novel while at school, I can hardly imagine setting aside a half an hour to read for pleasure? I can’t possibly be that busy. The key to solving the I-should-be-doing-something-productive dilemma is to give yourself some grace. Purposefully allot time in your day to do something you love. This does not include socializing, eating, going to the gym or anything that pertains to taking care of yourself. What I am referring to is spending time completely by your lonesome and doing an activity you love. I promise this becomes habitual with time.
- Speak kindly about yourself
Coming from someone who has a fairly self-deprecating sense of humor, sometimes it pays to be kind to yourself. You don’t always have to be the butt of your own joke. You’re trying your best and you deserve credit for that. Even if you are “joking” around, it’s easy to internalize the negative sentiments you express about yourself. You are what you put out into the world. So take it easy on those jokes. For every few self-deprecating comments, make sure to throw in a good word or two about yourself.
- Nourish your body
I love eating buttered noodles or Ramen for dinner just as much as the next broke college student. HOWEVER, I fear those gym people were onto something with the whole protein thing. I used to rarely eat meat or eggs at school. Not because I was ever on a diet or anything but because the high-protein options at the dining hall always looked less appealing than getting pasta and a fruit bowl for the 5th night in a row. Of course, struggle meals are always valid. HOWEVER, your body will thank you for even a minuscule increase in your daily protein and/or nutrient intake. When I actually started increasing my protein intake, I was shocked at how much better I felt. Like, wow? I actually feel energized and not immediately hungry again after eating? Shocking development. Am I suggesting that you obsessively track your macros? Absolutely not. I am merely suggesting that you try incorporating more food groups into your meals. You will be amazed at how much of a difference this makes in your mood and energy levels.
- Mindful media consumption
Before you even think about it, no, I am not referring to TikTok or Instagram. I am referring to any other type of media that at least satiates your brain in some way. As a Tik-Tok and Instagram reels addict myself, I know how gripping those apps can be and certainly do not need reminders to use them. When I say media, I am referring to good old-fashioned Netflix or books (perhaps you can start with one of the many that are stacked on your nightstand, collecting dust). Sorry that the last bit was harsh but rest assured that I am projecting. As someone who has recently rekindled my love for reading, I can say with full confidence that reaching for a book before bed is more fulfilling than wasting hours scrolling through TikTok whilst internally shaming myself for not doing something more productive. Another form of media I love consuming is long, preferably multi-part documentaries about extremely obscure topics I had no knowledge of prior. For some reason, this is equally satiating. However, if neither of these are for you, let me suggest taking up any of the following: video essays on YouTube, watching tear-jerking movies or, if you are feeling crazy, opening the god-forsaken news app, leading you to get worked up and inevitably rant to your roommate about the political and economic state of the world. Of course, this is all hypothetical and I am not speaking from experience.
- Look good, feel good:
Whether it’s a matter of getting up five minutes, ten minutes or even twenty minutes earlier than my regular wakeup time, I always notice a significant difference in how I feel about myself throughout the day if I put a little extra effort in my appearance that morning. I’m not saying you should pull a Cassie Howard from Euphoria and wake up excessively early to finetune your appearance. All I am saying is that a little effort goes a long way in improving your mood. So, try out a new outfit and wow all of your fellow classmates in your 8 AM. Blow out your hair for a random lunch at Croads with your friend. Combat Sunday scaries by putting on a little bit of makeup alongside your groufit before you lock yourself in the library all day. You will be surprised by the psychological effects this has. Even if you couldn’t care less about how other people perceive you, think of yourself a couple hours ahead of time. Imagine you go to the bathroom mid-study session and instead of looking in the mirror to see your exhausted, midterm week face staring back at you, you look in the mirror and think, wow, at least I look good and move on with your day.
- Dress for the weather:
Hear me out on this one. You can dress cute while still bundling up. Last spring semester I fell victim to every wannabe fashionista’s dilemma: the coat did not always match the outfit. I ditched the coat one too many times just because I would tell myself things like “I couldn’t possibly wear this long flannel with a cropped jacket” or “I’ve already been seen in this jacket too many times this week.” Pro-tip: nobody cares that much about what you are wearing and you can take the jacket off as soon as you get inside. This spring semester I am not making the same mistake. If you’ve seen me walking around campus recently then you’ve likely seen me bundled up in my Patagonia jacket with a beanie, jacket hood and fingerless gloves on, all while hitting the Bob Dylan stance (if you know, you know). Let me tell you, I do not regret this decision one bit. I stay warm in these whipping Worcester winds and my body thanks me for it. Real self love is appreciating that sometimes comfort takes precedence over aesthetic. Don’t worry, my outfits come springtime will make up for this sacrifice.
- Vlog the mundane:
Everyone has boring days. You are not the only person who feels like they are living the same weekly cycle over and over again. Not that I can personally verify but I would even venture to say that even Beyonce has boring days. If Beyonce can manage, we all can manage. One way to remedy boredom is to trick yourself into believing life is more exciting than it is. Your iced latte at Steinbucks was made perfectly today? Document it. Send a picture to your friends to let them know what to order next time they come. Have a lot of appointments this upcoming week? Write them all down on a calendar and cross them off as you go to make yourself feel more accomplished for attending to your personal needs. Going out with your friends? Make vlogs to laugh at the next morning. Embarking on a road trip to your hometown? Give consistent updates on your private story so your friends can appreciate the exact moment in your journey that you switched from Lana del Rey essentials to Pop Smoke essentials. The world is truly your oyster and the rest of us are just living in it.
- Call your mom:
Okay, I know this one is technically “relational” as it obviously requires the compliance of a second party. HOWEVER, I simply could not leave this one out. Sometimes when I’m in a funk all I need to do is hear my mom’s voice and I instantly feel better. While calling my mom will never replicate the pure healing that occurs over a kitchen counter, this is the next best thing. Let it all out, including every awkward social interaction you’ve had in the past week, or month even, the never ending school work, the professor or situationship that’s driving you into an internal spiral, how much you miss home cooked meals…just let it go. If your mom is anything like mine, she’ll keep things real with you yet still manage to make you feel 100% better about any conglomeration of stressful situations. Calling your mom is an act of self-love. I rest my case.