Hofstra Coffee: A Definitive Ranking

I love coffee more than most things in the world.

I drink at least 2 cups of it every day, and when I don’t I feel like I’m dying. It’s tragic, but it’s a reality of my life and the life of many other students. While I do love coffee, not every coffee is brewed the same. Sometimes we rank things on a scale of good to bad, and that’s what I did with all the coffees on campus. You’re welcome.

Image courtesy of Danielle MacInnes

#9: Dutch Treats

I don’t even want to go into this one. It stressed me out to try it. It was barely hot, and it didn’t even taste like coffee. I wouldn’t wish this one on my worst enemy.

#8: The Netherlands

I’m really disappointed with this one. The Netherlands has some of the best food on campus. They have breakfast all day, and it makes me really happy when I can get chocolate chip pancakes whenever I want. However, their coffee leaves much to be desired. When you put milk in it, it turns grey for some reason, which is problematic. Be nice to yourself, don’t drink the coffee from The Netherlands.

#7: Student Center Café

If I’m being honest, this one isn’t bad if you need something extremely quick. They have multiple different brews, and they have different types of milk to put in it. It isn’t my first choice, but it isn’t my last. If it tried a little bit harder, it would probably be higher up on the list.

#6: Bits N Bytes

I have had to have coffee from Bits on more than one occasion. The good news: I could drink their iced coffee black. It wasn’t too bitter, but it also didn’t taste the best. If you need a quick pick-me-up on South Campus, the iced coffee isn’t a terrible alternative when the Dunkin’ Donuts line is inevitably out the door and Einstein is flooded as usual.

Image Courtesy of Clem Onojeghu

#4/5: ABP (Library and Stand-Alone)

Library: I love the library’s lattes. They don’t have soy milk or almond milk to make them, though, so you have to drink regular milk if you want a solid iced latte. That being said, they do have soy milk to put in their iced coffee.

Stand-Alone: Sadly, this coffee offended me a little bit. I don’t know if it’s because I always get it when it’s been sitting out or if it’s just always bad, but I’ve never been impressed with the hot or iced coffees.

Bottom line is:

Specialty drinks: Yes, if you aren’t lactose intolerant. If you are, proceed with caution, and take your lactose pills before.

Regular coffee: No. Just, no.  

#3: Starbucks/Café on the Corner

This isn’t a full running Starbucks, but their espresso is pretty okay and they have a wider variety of specialty drinks than most places on campus. They have soy milk and almond milk to substitute in, which is always a plus. Unfortunately, the line is always super long and there isn't a ton of time before class to stop. It’s also a little out of the way to walk all the way over the Unispan between classes.

#2: Dunkin’

In the debate between Dunkin’ Donuts coffee and Starbucks coffee, I like Starbucks for hot drinks and Dunkin’ for cold drinks. This Dunkin’ falls on the higher end of the spectrum in terms of all the locations I’ve been to. However, the line is always insane. Sometimes it’s worth it to leave my dorm a little early to wait for a caramel iced latte. I appreciate their hard work, and it’s hard to mess up Dunkin’ iced coffee. Their hot coffee isn’t my favorite, but I do prefer their iced lattes over most drinks on campus. Dunkin’ Donuts is consistent, and sometimes that’s what you need from a coffee place.

#1: Einstein Bros.

Wow. Just, wow.

I was so surprised when I tried Einstein Bros. coffee for the first time. First of all, their cups are adorable. I love the teal straws. Also, they have reusable mugs for sale. If you have extra meal points, definitely go swipe one.

I got a cold press coffee and put soy milk in it. I was pleasantly surprised when I tried it. Their lattes, though. I’m not a coffee expert. I’ve never claimed to be, but I’ve tried a lot of coffee and espresso in my days, and this tasted so good. Plus, they have almond milk to put in their drinks. Bless yourself and try an iced latte from Einstein Bros. You can thank me later.

Concluding Thoughts

The ranking fell pretty much how I thought it would if I’m being honest. I’ve been getting Dunkin’ at least twice a week since the beginning of the semester. Its location is extremely convenient, and it’s worth the wait some mornings. I did not expect Einstein Bros. to surprise me like that. It isn’t the best coffee I’ve ever had, but it’s good to pick up if you’re on South Campus and are tired of drinking subpar coffee.

Image courtesy of Nathan Dumlau