I had always been tall, but it wasn’t until the seventh grade, during which I grew four inches in a single year, that I became very aware and, at many times, insecure, about my height. All throughout middle school and high school I wished that somehow I could go to sleep one night and wake up a few inches shorter, just enough to be considered a “normal” girl. It was a tall order, but in college I finally started accepting my status as a powerful, tall woman and began embracing my extra inches instead of wishing them away.
Photo courtesy of Anthony Tran
Any tall girl (or tall person for that matter!) grew up hearing the obvious remarks, ranging from the innocent “Do you play basketball?” to the more teasing “How’s the weather up there?” Being tall isn’t a negative characteristic. Or a choice. Or a flaw of some kind. And yet, years of internalized insecurity about my physical features forced me to see my height as if it was somehow all of those things. Junior high and even high school is a point in time in which people want to take up the least amount of space possible in a room, so I guess you could say my tall height felt like my shortcoming. I felt embarrassed in junior high to be taller than many of the boys in my grade, who biologically wouldn’t start getting taller until at least sophomore year of high school. I avoided wearing high heels, dresses that would show off my legs, and I’d often slouch to try and appear shorter. But something very interesting would occur when I walked down the street and saw another tall woman. Rather than thinking the same hurtful things that I would say to myself looking in a mirror, instead I felt incredibly empowered. A tall woman walking in heels down a city street emits this unique energy of feminine power — she carries herself in such a way that no one could possibly trample her, or hinder her success in life. Looking at those women, I thought back then that there was no possible way they had ever felt insecure, and it consequently made me feel even worse about myself. Why couldn’t I carry myself like that and own my height in the way those beautiful women did?
Here’s a tall tale from my high school experience. In my freshman year of high school, I recall deciding to wear heels to my semi-formal dance. There had been other moments during those years that I would throw caution to the wind in an attempt to disregard my lack of self-confidence surrounding my height, but it was this particular instance that truly stuck out to me. I had walked into the sweaty school gymnasium to greet my friends, and immediately a few of them were visibly angry that I had decided to wear heels. Some of them were obviously joking about “making me take those heels off,” but I can’t forget the shame and embarrassment I felt by how uncomfortable I had seemed to make everyone around me feel all because I was a couple inches taller than my regular height in an effort to finally feel beautiful. I didn’t wear heels after that night for a long time, only gaining the courage to start wearing them occasionally for other dances or school shows.
Photo courtesy of Becca Tapert
When I got to college, I knew that a goal of mine was to dress nicely for my classes. After six years of having a school uniform and wearing khaki pants five days of the week, being able to choose what I felt comfortable wearing was one of the most liberating parts of going to college. Since I chose a school next to one of the fashion capitals of the world, I knew I could make far bolder choices in clothing than I probably would have in upstate New York. When shopping for school clothes, I made sure to buy a few pairs of heels to finally start attacking this issue head-on. Furthermore, I wanted to go into college with a fresh start, abandoning many of the insecurities that had plagued my middle and high school experience. College is the perfect place for working on yourself and reinventing yourself to be the best version you can be. And that’s exactly what I’ve been doing for two years now. I feel far more comfortable having friends that are much shorter than me, and not feeling apologetic about my gene expression that I couldn’t possibly have any control over. When I walk down the streets of Manhattan, I am that powerful woman whom I admired so much in the past. I have a newfound appreciation for those tall women not because they seemed to have never felt insecure about their heights, but because despite feeling insecure at some point in their lives, they had chosen to put on stilettos, wear short dresses and fitting clothing, and carried themselves with the most incredible confidence and beauty.
People who try and put others (especially women) down because of how short or tall they are are clearly just insecure about something in their own lives that they can’t control, and it’s only a matter of time before they finally get off their high horse. When I got to college and found a sense of independence and an amazing support system, I decided to own my height and not feel like I needed to compensate for it. Now I’m reaching new heights in life through self-love. Certainly, there are times when I still feel insecure, especially around guys that are my height or shorter than me, but internalizing that essence and power of a tall woman helps me to truly love who I am. No matter how short or tall you are, you should be able to freely express yourself and never apologize for something that adds to your beauty, not hinders it. To all my tall goddesses out there, Hollister sells high-waisted jeans specifically designed for tall body shapes; and to answer your question, the weather up here is bright, sunny, and promising.