Welcome to the first installment of Drunk Confessions! As Hannah Montana brilliantly sings, “Everybody makes mistakes. Everybody has those days.” We’ve all had those wild nights out which can often times take an expected turn for the worst in the moment, but in reality they make one hell of a story. These are some anonymous submissions from our readers of their drunk confessions.
“One time I fell asleep in front of the freshman apartments and woke up in those flower box things outside of them. It rained that night, so I woke up all wet and was still in my heels and dress from the night before. I threw up next to myself and had bruises all over. Winning at life right there.”
“One time I was super drunk and having sex with my boyfriend. I guess the drunk shits hit me early or something, because when I came, a little poop came out too! It wasn’t a lot, maybe half an inch or so, but we both laughed. It’s still crazy embarrassing, and I’ve never told anyone except my closest friends.”
“I went out for my friends birthday. On the way to the club I threw up in the Uber. In my blackout state I knew I could not afford the fee for puking in an Uber so I threw up into my romper. I went to the club till 2am and lost all my cards. When I got back to campus, I realized I couldn’t get into my dorm so I went to my friends. I sat on her floor for an hour and cried while looking up at the ceiling. She asked me what I was doing, my response was ‘looking for Jesus’.”
“I had sex with a reoccurring hook up after he puked on my friend’s dress that I borrowed. The next morning, hungover of course, we got a ride back to campus from his roommate. I had post sex hair, his shirt on, my friend’s dress in a trash bag, shoes in hand, and no underwear walking back to my dorm. I’m still trying to figure out where my underwear went, 4 months later.”
“My first Halloween down in Waikiki my freshman year – my friends and I got so drunk and the Uber surge charges were $75. It was 3 in the morning and we were just trying to make it back to Campus. So, we decided to walk 3 miles to go back to UH. Here I am, dressed as a purple genie with no shoes, and I had to be thrown into a Safeway shopping cart to make it back to the dorms.”
From vomit to shopping carts all of these stories are amazing drunk confessions, thank you to our anonymous submissions, if you would like to be included in the next article here’s the link to the Google form! We would love to hear you drunk confession!