Alright, let’s be honest here, flirting should be the most simple thing to do and should be easy to figure out. However, not everyone understands the who, why, and how. In order to better address this issue, I went on a quest around Georgia Southern and found many willing to share their take on flirting. You better thank these strangers! :D
What do you consider flirting?
-random conversations
-smiling
-whistling
-introducing/referring to you by name
– ‘you can tell because they pay you more attention.’
-‘like if you tell me my hair looks good when I know it doesn’t that day.’ (out of the ordinary compliments)
-touch
-texting first (with cute emoji’s)
-texting on a daily basis
-gazing/eye contact
-when they use “that voice”-vocal inflection
-anything that would make your BF/GF jealous
-witty texts
(remember, these are opinions; we will assess what constitutes definite flirting later)
What are the motives?
– ‘you mean for guys? ahem… you know, you like what you see.’
– The point is to get his/her number
– To be nice or friendly on occasion
– Tell me I’m pretty
– I think you’re attractive
Would you ever flirt with someone you don’t like or didn’t find attractive?
-Person: ‘Well, I’m married…’ A.B: ‘If you weren’t married would you?’ Anonymous: ‘I mean yeah, to be sweet.’
-‘No, I would never flirt with someone if I thought they were ugly.’
-‘No, I’d never let it get too far, I mean, if it makes you feel bad about it I wouldn’t.’
-‘Yes, but no, only for servers. It’s good for customer service.’
-‘If you don’t like the person and you keep flirting with them. Eh… It’s kind of like you’re playing with their emotions.’
-‘Yes, with friends you’ve known for a long time because they know what you mean.’
(sorry if I just ruined that Aerosmith song for you)
Have you ever had someone flirt with you that didn’t like you? How did you feel?
-‘Yes, I mean… it was kinda sad.’
-‘It is kind of heartbreaking but I wouldn’t let it get to that point.’
-‘I felt like I wasted energy.’
-‘Let down.’
Or could you imagine if your current husband/ s.o. had flirted with you but didn’t really admire you?
-‘It would be kinda like rejection, because, you know I like him.’
(Oh Raj, you would never betray us)
Definitely Flirting:
-If he/she is pursuing you
-If it’s consistent, it’s flirting
-‘I like to put myself in his shoes (her BF). Like if I would be mad at him for doing it, I don’t.’ (anything considered flirtatious)
-If he/she uses random excuses to talk to you
-When he/she mentions “us” in relation to being together somewhere
When you’re just friends:
-If you mention “friend” at all when referring to him/her
– You end every invite with “as friends”
-If you text him/her, but you text everyone
-If you compliment him/her, but you compliment everyone else
-If you can repeatedly talk about guys/girls around him/her
-If you can repeatedly talk about guys/girls you can set your friend up with
-Talking about your feelings without ever mentioning you like/love him/her
-Very straightforward texts
Remember: When you’re in college, you’re in a constant transitional stage and don’t fully know who you are, who you want to be around, or where you’ll be next- so you cannot expect people to give up this time in their life to stick by you. Even people who want commitment aren’t looking for something steady when they don’t have any time to make the relationship as fantastic as they would like. That makes it all the more fun to flirt though. You’ll figure out who is worth it to you in the right time. Just be honest and treat others how you’d like to be treated. A little love never hurt anyone.
1 Corinthians 13:4