More often than not, most college students write off the idea of a long-distance relationship as “impossible” and that they never work. But often times, people just don’t want to put in the work for a long-distance relationship to be successful. True, it can be extremely difficult at times, but all relationships take effort and communication. Here are some ways you can make your long-distance relationship work.
1. Know each other’s schedules
Being familiar with where your significant other is during the day is critical. There is no reason to expect them to reply to your text instantaneously if they are at work or in class. Being aware of each other’s schedules also helps in figuring out the best times to call or Facetime. It’s super easy to setup a shared Google Calendar if that’s what you’re into, or just write down the constantly recurring events on a slip of paper and put it where you will see it every day!
2. Always have your next visit planned
Being apart is so much easier when you have a date circled on the calendar for the next time you’re going to see your love. Without a date to look forward to, it might sometimes feel like you’re living in limbo. Try to come up with a plan of how often you’ll visit or take a trip together, and stick to it. Depending on how often you are able to visit and how far away you are from one another, try to plan these visits at least a couple in advance so you have something to look forward to as soon as you leave them.
3. Make your visits count
You don’t get the opportunity to sit face-to-face with your partner and just be with them as you might like; so when you do, make sure you really soak up that time. Take away the distractions, cuddle, have a night out on the town, get coffee with your SO and leave the phones at home. There’s really no need to take them with you. Don’t let Instagram take away the little time you have with this person you care so deeply about.
4. Be open and honest
Communication is one of the biggest problems every relationship has- whether they live together or thousands of miles apart. Learning to be vulnerable and truthful about your feelings in a loving and gracious way is difficult, but it will do so much for your relationship. You’ll become closer to each other than ever before by breaking down those walls that many people have and work so hard to shut people out. One way to stay emotionally close while you’re physically apart is to tell each other everything you can. Share your highest highs, your lowest lows and all the “boring” stuff in between.
5. Think about the big picture
No matter how you see yourselves in a few years, the goal of an LDR is never to stay long-distance forever. When it gets really hard, try to visualize what life will be like when you two are finally together for good, no distance in between you whatsoever. Remind yourself of how much this is worth the fight by remembering why you love and care for your SO so much. Dream big dreams together of what you two will do when the distance is finally over.
Good luck out there, collegiettes. LDRs can be daunting, and our peers are often not the most supportive when it comes to rooting for those that are in one. Just don’t forget that whoever you care for is worth the struggle.