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Once again, we Her Campus at Geneseo are back to provide you with more quotes and more fun from our favorite professors on campus. 

 

Let’s get this started!

 

“There are 192 billiard balls in the world today.”
 
“If you put anything on the side of a bus British people will believe it.”
 
“I’m a terrible mother so I make up for it by being a good professor. Here’s your quiz.”
 
“Who here has had cabbage this week?” 
 
“You guys should drink a glass of wine, maybe red wine, to loosen up so your drawings are better.”
 
“Love doesn’t exist, it’s just a series of neurochemicals telling you to leave a legacy.”
 
“I lost my wedding ring in the Eastview mall.”
 
“When my daughter wouldn’t eat her clementines, I showed her pictures of scurvy so she’d eat them.”
 
“Yeah, so you see all these babies who look like burritos with hats on just sitting outside.”
 
“You don’t know alcohol. You don’t know how to drive. You guys are no fun.”
 
“Whenever I open up a walnut, I think, ‘That looks like a brain with Alzheimer’s.’”
 
Student: “I love your new tattoo!” 
Professor: “Thanks! I’m getting a divorce so it’s just another life change.”
 
“We’re going to pretend I’m capitalism. Hi, I’m capitalism! Fuck you.”
 
“If we end up a dystopia, I blame sports.”
 
“Okay guys so today I’m gonna be a bit of a Nazi.”
 
“Anyone here tried peyote?” 
 
“Go have a kid. Come back in nine months.”
 
“They scan your groceries at Wegmans, they don’t try and fight you.” 
 
“Can you tell I have a type A personality? Yeah that’s just me … my wife hates me.” 
 
“KOREAN JESUS???” 
 
“Yeah they gave a shirt that says ‘I love Vagina’ … haha great humor.”
 
“Military porn talk seems to be Trump’s strategy.” 
 
“So maybe after trick or treating sit down and think about East Asian politics for a little while.” 
 
“Obviously there’s nothing romantic about setting off chemical weapons.”
 
“If you go completely off the rails and start throwing things at other people, I will not give you full credit.” 
 
“Now we mark the harvest with the arrival of the pumpkin muffin at Tim Hortons.”
 
“I’m sorry. I was thinking about parents having sex.”
 
“He was like a pregnant woman. He ate for two.” 
 
“You know that I am emotionally a two-year-old.”

 

Don’t you just love professors?

 

Sydney is a member of the class of 2020 majoring in International Relations and Political Science with a minor in French. She is also Vice President of Geneseo's club figure skating team and coaches local kids in the sport on the weekends. While she's not really sure where life is going to take her yet, she's optimistic about the future.
Jessica Bansbach is a junior psychology major who has more campus club memberships than fingers and toes. In her spare time, if she's forgotten that she's a college student that has more pressing matters to attend to (like, say, studying), she enjoys video games, thrift shopping, and ruminating. She was elected "funniest in group" by her summer camp counselor when she was nine and has since spent the next eleven years trying to live up to the impossible weight of that title.
Megan Kelly is a psychology major at SUNY Geneseo. She enjoys writing articles about whatever interests her at the moment, so don't expect any consistency.
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