TRIGGER WARNING
This article contains information about sexual assault which may be triggering to survivors.
*Names have been changed due to maintain confidentiality.
A few months ago, I was sexually assaulted on Furman’s campus.
I had gone out to the barn with a group of friends. I only had two drinks and no, I was not drugged. Upon arriving back to my apartment in North Village, I decided to go to bed. A post-game was happening in our apartment, but I knew I had an early morning and needed sleep.
I was woken up because a Furman student had entered my room, laid in bed behind me, and put his hand up my shirt. Before I could process what was happening, he began to slide his hand into my shorts. I realized that it was James* who I had met for the first time that night and had no interest in. I shoved him off of me and demanded that he leave. I did not consent to any of his actions because I was asleep.
There are no words to describe what I felt the next morning. To this day, I still feel sick to my stomach thinking about what could’ve happened had I not been sober. I felt like it was my fault for not locking my door, or for not waking up sooner. I knew that I needed to talk to an adult about what had happened because I felt like my friends wouldn’t understand or think that it was a big deal.
I gathered up the courage to contact the student life center on Furman’s campus. My motivation was that maybe it could prevent another sexual assault from happening. I met with the student life success coordinator and from there I was encouraged to speak with the Title IX coordinator on campus to report my sexual assault.
I felt that my Title IX meeting was incredibly helpful. They confirmed that by the handbook I was sexually assaulted, and I was given further information on Title IX as well as resources to help me. It was hard to talk through what had happened to me, but I was assured that they would keep record of it and that I could request that they take measures to prevent it from happening again. I was grateful that they had clearly outlined my options and that they had resources to help victims.
After reporting my sexual assault, I still felt completely alone. I did not have the strength to reach out to the resources I was given, and I feared retaliation as James* was involved in many organizations and was well-liked on campus. I suffered from depression and anxiety and I abandoned some of my closest friends. As the victim, it was up to me to decide while I was in an extremely fragile state.
The Title IX coordinator did not follow up with me after I reported my assault. Seeking help is placed on the victim as their responsibility. Beyond the first initial meeting with Title IX, more care and attention should be given to survivors. Even a follow up meeting to ask how the victim is doing could make a huge difference, even if they don’t want to take action against their assaulter. Victims are left with fear of retaliation and lasting psychological trauma. Some cannot even finish their higher education after experiencing a sexual assault on Furman’s campus.
I’ve received multiple surveys from Furman asking about my work experience, my education, and my professor’s class performance. I’ve also been asked if Furman University is committed to the health and well-being of its students. But it’s truly shocking that I have never been explicitly asked if Furman University handles sexual assault in a way that students feel safe.
It is time for Furman to stop hovering around the topic of sexual assault and directly address it. 1 in 5 women in college experience sexual assault; just because we may live in a “bubble” does not mean that we somehow avoid this statistic.
It hasn’t even been a year since I reported my sexual assault, but I am sharing my story with you in the hopes that other sexual assault survivors will find courage to seek the care that they need on Furman’s campus regardless if they choose to report it or not. Resources are available for survivors, but strength and courage are needed to reach out to them. If you’ve been sexually assaulted, you are not alone. #MeToo
If you have experienced sexual assault, you are encouraged to report the incident to Furman University Police Department and/or to Furman’s Title IX Coordinator, Melissa Nichols Email: Melissa.nichols@furman.edu Office: Trone Center, Second Floor, Suite 215
Student Success Coordinator: Sarah Tobin. Phone: 864.294.2244 email: sarah.tobin@furman.edu
The Julie Valentine Center: A nonprofit organization that provides free, confidential services to sexual assault and child abuse survivors and their families. 24-hour crisis hotline: 864-467-3633
Furman Counseling Center: To schedule an appointment call 864.294.3031 or visit them in the lower level of the Earle Infirmary.