How do you speak to your loved ones? How do you speak to those that you admire? I would assume you speak to them in a particular way because you view them highly. Now, how do you speak to yourself? If it’s any different than the way you speak to those you love and admire then there’s a problem.
When your friends are having bad days or going through things, you give them a pep talk and let them know that they’ll be okay. You motivate them, inspire them and encourage them.
So why don’t you speak to yourself in the same way? Why is it that you beat yourself up over certain things, but you let others know that he or she will get through it? It’s easy to speak kind and uplifting words to others but when the roles are reversed, it is difficult to do the same thing for ourselves.
I started noticing this within myself and I have decided to change that. I could easily tell my friends that they were the bomb.com and they had everything going for them, but I couldn’t tell myself the same thing. I could take an objective perspective and help them rationalize through their problems, but I couldn’t do that for myself.
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It’s easy to be compassionate and kind to others but often times we forget to do the same for ourselves. Although it requires very intentional work, it’s important that you speak highly of yourself because you are listening. If you’re always calling yourself a lazy procrastinator, you will continue to be lazy and procrastinate. If you always talk about how you have an attitude and you’re rude, that is also what will continue. How can you expect to improve on certain aspects of your life if you keep speaking certain things into existence? Whether you notice it or not, the way you speak about yourself builds the foundation for how others speak to you, how you’re perceived, and how you perceive yourself.
Instead of saying, “I can’t do anything right and I mess up everything,” try saying something more positive, along the lines of “I’m not perfect but I’m trying, lesson learned.” The power of the tongue is often underestimated, and it shouldn’t be. By speaking highly of yourself, you are essentially training your brain to think highly of yourself as well. If you start telling yourself that you’re great and you have great things coming your way, you will start to believe it. Sometimes we all need to look at life with rose-colored glasses. We need to remind ourselves that we deserve positivity.
Speak to yourself the same way you speak to those that you love and admire. Make it a habit to tell yourself the things you would want to hear from someone else. You’ll see a change in the way you view yourself as well as the way others view you. As you become aware of the way you speak on yourself you will also notice just how often you talk down on yourself. Become intentional in the words you speak on yourself.