Not always and some moments feel like scenes out of a movie. But there are some times when you feel like you’ll never catch a break. Recently I found a quote on Instagram saying “some of y’all don’t clap for others, that’s why it will never be your turn” @drunkinpoetry. That made me take a step back and evaluate why that made so much sense. When you are always focused on the negative, it spreads like wildfire, it can take a toll on your friendships, your relationship and yourself.
It had me thinking. Sometimes it was difficult to see all of my friends going on to do great things and being unable to fully celebrate them the way they deserved to. You know the selfish thoughts come up, like, “Why didn’t I think of that?” and, “Why didn’t I get those opportunities?” Then it hit me, I wasn’t happy with myself. I have a great family, a group of amazing friends and a good job. Why did I feel like there could have been more?
The majority of people like to believe that gratitude is a feeling, but I believe it’s a choice. Choosing to feel like today you are enough and being so happy where you are now. Whether you would like to believe it or not, there is a past version of yourself that would be proud of who you became to be.
For me, it started with not wanting to feel like a burden on my friends anymore. They are there to support you, but try and be aware of their thoughts and feelings as well. Sympathetically, not everything is about you. Meaning that if your friends feel off or short, it might be because they have a heavy week. It does not necessarily mean you did something wrong. Though I understand it is hard to believe that always.
Having security and confidence will come with accepting what you have versus what you don’t. I think saying positive things to yourself and the world will help create a positive space that allows you to be happy for yourself. It has to be for you. If you are trying to fulfill happiness in other people, it will be temporary. Do it for yourself.
That is not to say positivity wins. I know that it doesn’t. I don’t want to invalidate your struggles; I just want to help you make them more manageable, so it doesn’t feel like the world is against you when things go awry. Taking the step to acknowledge the thought but not let it consume you will give you an advantage in life.
Friends should be your support but not your punching bags. They should be there to support you at your lowest and celebrate you at your highest. If you don’t, or better yet can’t do the same for them, it’s time to take a look at yourself and wonder, “Am I actually happy?” If the answer is no, try to wake up and find three reasons your life is good. Small or large, any reason is reason enough to be thankful.
Practicing gratitude will change your life.
Life sucks, but it doesn’t always have to.