Coming to college, it can be difficult to navigate friendships and find a balance between the fun and the serious aspects of life. While having friends with whom you can party and dance is crucial to your well-being, intellectual friendships are important too.
At the beginning of college, I struggled a lot navigating friendships. I often felt like I had these great friends, but I didn’t have anyone to talk to about the things I was reading that truly interested me.
It left me feeling alone at times. How could I be so interested in something that no one I cared about felt similarly about? I decided to branch out of my comfort zone and talk to people who were interested in the same things I was through both classes and clubs.
Finding Friends with Similar Interests
The first step I took was to join FSU’s literary magazine, The Kudzu Review. This endeavor introduced me to some people I’m still close to today, even after they have graduated! I was able to bond with my friends not only over my love of poetry but also over my love of debate.
At every meeting, we would spend hours talking about something we loved, even disagreeing with each other. Then, we would still hang out and talk for hours afterward. To call this refreshing would be a total understatement.
This showed me that my interests weren’t at all alien; I just had to look around for the right people. It wasn’t always an easy task to find places where I could talk about what I loved and connect over it, but my journey was just beginning.
New Experiences with new Friends
The next summer, I studied abroad, gaining the opportunity to take classes that I was interested in while in a totally new place with totally new people. I found that the friendships I took a semester to build on campus formed within the week in London.
This experience allowed me to reach a level of confidence in myself that I can’t quite describe. I felt like, for the first time in my life, I had friends who wouldn’t only stimulate my fun side but also my intellectual side.
It became clear to me that this was something that I could handle and achieve here. Even in a place where you don’t always feel like the target audience, there’s always someone there for you.
Learning this lesson transformed my college experience beyond recognition. Of course, I had my friends with whom I could lie on the beach and have nothing matter, but I also had my friends with whom I could stay up until 2 a.m. reading an essay and comparing notes.
What I’ve Learned
Walking towards graduation in a few short months, I have a new confidence about who I am and where I am, instilled and built by the friends I have made along the way. It’s my friends who have always been there at the end of the day, and I know that they’ll always be there.
Along the way, there can be rough patches and losses, but the ones who help you grow, in whatever way that may be — intellectually, socially, personally, or otherwise — are the ones that you will take with you onwards.
Sometimes, carrying on a friendship can offer a new perspective, even if you lose touch. These are the people who make us who we are and create experiences worth enduring.
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