The expectations that are placed on us can seem completely out of reach or entirely unattainable. We begin to listen to those outside voices more than we listen to ourselves, and this is where a big problem lies. Who are you living for? Whose happiness are you trying to achieve? If the first answer that popped up in your head wasn’t yourself, this is another issue. What is it that you want to accomplish in life? How are you working to obtain your goals? What is your plan and what are the steps that you are going to take in order to reach your dreams? It’s okay not to have everything figured out right now, but it is important to at least have a general concept of how you plan to get to where you desire. The main focus of all of this is to start putting yourself first.
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There’s many of us out there who want to please other people. We feel like we aren’t doing enough for someone else, and we keep putting in more and more of our own time and effort into something that we aren’t even passionate about. Why waste all that energy on something that you don’t feel a connection to? Putting yourself first and doing what’s in your best interest is not selfish. Some of us have such big hearts that we’d tend to go above and beyond for everyone else except ourselves. Go above and beyond for you because you deserve good things. It’s understandable that we may want to be there for others, and we hate letting people down, but it shouldn’t come to a point where you are barely satisfying your own needs. You’ve placed all this time and effort on making someone else happy rather than focusing on factors that are directly influencing you.
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Of course, it is important to remain selfless—doing things from the kindness of your heart is a gift to yourself and others. Selfless acts are what makes you a down-to-earth person and never forget that. For example, there’s a big difference between going to help with a beach cleanup, and letting your parents decide what major you should graduate from college with. Understand what a self-less act for a great cause is and letting people walk all over you is. You might be so caught up in fulfilling other’s needs, that you haven’t even experienced what it’s like to live for yourself. People these days often love to take advantage of those that are good and kind, but there comes a point where you have to put your foot down and let these people know that they cannot dictate the direction that you want to go in. You are the designated driver of your life, do not give someone else the authority to get behind the wheel. Doing what you love, what’s best for you, and making your own choices is one of the biggest parts of self-care.
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