Social media is this generation’s biggest innovation and we are its guinea pigs. Our generation is the first to grow up with our own personal, streamlined stage from which to self-advertise, connect across continents, and publish our memories.
However, as seen in many experiments, the results are complicated. The platforms now used to expand our personal connection have also brought feelings of inadequacy and loneliness. An article in The New Yorker reports that, while social media sites like Facebook encourage social engagement, it also can create a sense of competition and isolation. How is it that we can become both more engaged and more isolated at the same time? More fulfilled but also emptier?
Information about the next hangout or next scandal is now not only in our pockets, but on our wrists. The world is moving quickly, and it can be difficult to exist in the moment when there are so many moments to be had in our hand. How many conversations have you had that took longer because your friend was only half-listening as she checked her messages? How many times did a friend stop to stage a scene for a picture instead of enjoying a walk down the beach with you? How many times were you that friend?
I think that there is a way to incorporate it into our lives so that we get the best of both worlds: digital and physical. Maybe we can use social media to enhance our personal lives, not the other way around. I know, it’s tough, but stay with me here. Maybe with just a few small changes we can have the balance we all need.
When you get to your destination, put it away. I mean it. Physically put it out of your sight. This is my biggest pet peeve, and even I am guilty of it. When you are gathered around for movie night, who do you need to be in contact with? What is so important that it can’t wait until after dinner with friends you haven’t seen in months? My friends and I implement “phone stacking” when we hang out. It goes like this: everyone in the group places their phones one on top of one another face-down, and anyone to reach for the device before it’s time to go has to pay for the meal, outing, or whatever. There is so much more fun to be had when you don’t have the crutch of social media, and we usually have a much better time.
Unfollow celebrities—or, if you can’t do that, realize that they are professionals. Thank the beautiful stars above for Essena O’Neill (the instagram model who revealed the harsh truth behind the job). The unrealistic bar that society puts on women has moved from magazines and television into our personal media, and we choose to feed our insecurities. We started to believe that the models and celebrities we saw in the media actually looked that fabulous in their off-time because we had their Instagram accounts as “proof.” Essena O’Neill brought the truth to light, explaining that social media is a part of the job. We compare our everyday lives to the products they are putting out—our one take to their twenty. It’s not fair of us to do to ourselves and we have to recognize that.
Connect more. Social media has kept me in touch with family and friends that I have been separated from by miles, years, and changes. My favorite part of checking all my apps is catching up with what’s going on with a friend from middle school who I never see anymore. Instead of reveling in the competition or negativity, use social media to reach out to someone you miss, or connect with someone you see every day by using it to share a picture or funny article. Nothing beats face to face conversation, but social media can be a good addition.
My dad said it about broccoli and ice cream when I was five: everything in moderation. That can be more difficult to apply to social media in a world that is growing increasingly dependent on it, but it is important to monitor how we are using it. Social media is a great tool to unlock a globalizing world; we simply need to make sure we don’t let it pull us away from the local experiences we have as well.