We know you have some goals set in your Notes app on your iPhone that you’re hoping to achieve in 2016. But let’s face it: no one is hitting the gym after a night of partying so maybe we’ll go the next day … or the day after that. We all set the bar way too high for ourselves sometimes and it’s okay to laugh about how unrealistic some of your resolutions may have been. And, hey, if you strike out in week one there is always next week (or year)!
1. “I am not going to curse so much.”
There are many situations we get into that tempt us to use one of many colorful, four-letter words. For example you stub your toe, or drop your pen behind your bed, or burn your tongue on ramen … f***! By January 2nd the swear jar will already be pretty full.
2. “I’m not going to procrastinate and stay up past 2 a.m.”
By week two this will be your situation: you set an alarm for a two-hour nap but you’ve been listening to Justin Bieber and snapchatting for the past five hours. So, now you only have three sentences written for that paper that’s due tomorrow.
3. “I am going to see my advisor the first week back.”
Yea, right! You know you’ll find every excuse not to go.
4. “I need to eat healthier and lose at least fifteen pounds by summer.”
*Arrives on campus, unloads bags from car, walks into dorm/apartment/house, drops bags, pulls out take out menu from drawer* “Hmm … stromboli or cheeseburger??
5. “No late night pizza and dropping $50 on alcohol every weekend.”
Let’s be real. That pizza shop will feed you at 2 a.m. because its open 24 hours. Plus, nothing sounds better than a slice of pizza after a night of drinking.
6. “I’m going to actually TRY to look cute in the winter.”
As soon as the temperature hits below 30 degrees it’s sweatpants, marshmallow jackets, and blanket scarves from here on out. The sun’s mostly gone, but you are still gonna wear glasses to hide the bags and mascara-free eyelashes.
7. “I’ll hit up the gym at least six times a week.”
*Lays on couch with phone and watches workout videos* .
8. “I will call my mom and dad more often just to ask how they’re doing.”
“Hey mom and dad, can I have some money for textbooks, food, and ink for my printer? Oh yea! How is your busy, bill-paying life?”
9. “I will try to get out and explore rather than hibernate.”
Your roomie asks if you want to grab some fresh air and get some coffee. You give her the “I’m exhausted, I pulled an all-nighter” look.
10. “I will try to hand in my work early rather than the last minute before it’s due.”
You say it every time a paper or project is due, yet you still end up rushing and convincing yourself that you work better under pressure.
The fact of the matter is that our college lives would be so much less stressful if we didn’t fool around wasting time. Admit it, if we all didn’t procrastinate we would be getting more sleep, choosing healthier meals, and not cursing out a pen that rolled under a chair. However, college life is indeed crazy, so make sure not to set a goal you know you’ll never reach. Try to set more realistic goals for 2016 and stick to them! Don’t procrastinate on those resolutions and get ‘er done!