Speaking from my own experience, I’ve been afraid to be alone, in every possible context. I know can’t say that I have come to terms with my fear; I’m not here with any substantial advice directed at how to get over a fear of being alone. Completely the opposite actually, I’m here to stress how important it is to BE alone.
Being alone means coming to terms with yourself, and whether you’ve already figured out exactly who you are, unlikely, or if you’re still working on finding out who you are, the process can be uncomfortable since there are so many unknowns. Figuring out who you are is an individualized journey, and it often takes on different representations for each individual. All relationships in your life, whether romantic, familial, etc, require investment of energy and effort from both sides. That such investment becomes the grounding point in the relationship, and it’s essential in cultivating a positive and healthy relationship.
Consider this: how can one contribute to a strong, healthy relationship if they reside in a realm of conflict where they may be unsure of their identity or abilities. Taking time to figure yourself out is not, by any means, a step back in growth. Understanding who you are as a person allows you to get a better grasping on what you desire and aspire. Knowing what you want reserves you the ability to go into a relationship confidently, where you are in a positive state and can truly invest yourself.
Growing as an individual will only benefit you in the long run! I stress that being alone is exactly what you make of it. To be alone and happy is only in your control, so why wouldn’t you pursue it? Learn more about yourself. Go on walks, find a new hobby, watch a new movie, play a record, travel, but do it all alone.
I promise you will NOT end up alone. You will find your person, whomever and whenever that is, but there isn’t a rush. Everything will fall into place, and though it may sound cliché and worn out, everything happens for a reason. Trust me when I tell you that the time that you take to decipher who you are as an individual will open your mind and soul to so many new beginnings and discoveries. I leave you with a thought: learning to be alone and happy is a continuous process and no journey is like another, and it is not always a positive or comfortable process! Take a breath and take some time to invest in yourself. It only gets better from here.