There comes that time in every relationship where you start to think about living with your significant other. You start making pro and con lists in your head about how great it would be to be with them all the time, and then how possibly annoying it could actually be. I don’t think anyone should tell you whether or not you and your boo are ready for that step, but I wanted to share my experiences for some things I added to my own list since I started living with my boyfriend two months ago.
Con: double the fun = double the mess
Do you know how at your own house you don’t feel too bad about leaving your clothes all over the floor for a few days, or never wiping the makeup mess off the counter? Well, he is used to those things being fine too. So when there is a clothes mess in the room after laundry day, it’s going to be twice as big as it was before. If you decide you want to clean the whole house but their stuff is everywhere, you either get double the work load or just have to leave it there and be a bit annoyed when it’s still there the next day. I have learned that my boyfriend leaves his clothes in the washer or dryer for days without a second thought. And I’m pretty sure he has never folded anything in his life. There is so much more cleaning to do all around the house.
Pro: saving money by living together
When you live together you don’t have to pay your own bills separately anymore. You can split the costs of utilities, rent, and even food. You can even carpool to tons of places together and save money on gas or taxi rides. When you need to buy furniture, you can make it a joint purchase. Ultimately since living with my boyfriend I know I have saved money on lots of things and for this I am very grateful.
Con: no more me time
Even though it was annoying not to get to see him every day before we moved in, those nights alone are kind of sanctuary for me! Listening to my own music quietly in bed without any interruptions was peaceful. But now, if I try to do homework, all I hear are his video games in the background. When I want to go to bed early, it’s harder to do. You kind of have to learn to like what they like, because otherwise you’ll constantly be fighting over what TV show to watch.
Pro: “Honey, I’m home!”
You never have to pack an overnight bag, or drive anywhere to be with the one you love! It’s such a refreshing feeling to come home every day and already be with them! No more arguing over who’s house you’ll be sleeping at this night or that, or being sad that you can’t go over all the time and still get your school work done. No more waiting for his roommates to leave the house, or yours for that matter. No more being alone all the time and wondering if your S/O is home yet. They are right there with you for everything.
Con: what’s fair might not be even
It seems like no matter what, either my boyfriend or I is always feeling a little bit more involved that the other in doing things for the household. Sometimes one person just hates taking out the garbage(me), or hates grocery shopping(him). You find yourself sort of resenting the other for not taking on those tasks. If only one person knows how to cook, you’ll have to get used to taking on that role most days, because otherwise you’ll both suffer. Now don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to be able to do things for someone else that will make them happy, but it can get old.
Pro: build your relationship
When you work together to accomplish things at home and are always there for one another, you become more bonded, and in turn your relationship will grow! You’ll learn to love one another for so many more reasons, and can really see yourselves lasting for the long run. Living together is a great time to see how well you work as a couple and the things you each value in a partner.
If you’re still considering living with your significant other after reading my list, you are probably ready to take the leap! For me, even though the negatives are definitely noticeable, I would never go back to living with anyone else. Having my boyfriend there with me at home each day is a joy. I hope this helps any of you who may be looking toward the next big step in your relationship.
Hey HC girls! Have any of you recently moved in with your significant other? Well if you have any tips for the rest of us, leave them for us in the comment section below.