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Tessa Pesicka / Her Campus
Life

What If The Answer Is Just To Keep Asking?

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at CU Boulder chapter.

What if the questions I carry never find their resting place? What if I wander forever, like dust between stars, searching for answers that aren’t meant to be answered but simply felt, folded into the marrow of who I am becoming? What if the journey is the only meaning, the endless grappling with truth and shadow, and the way my heart aches to make peace with the unknown?

What if growing up means learning that some dreams dissolve, not because they’re impossible, but because they weren’t made for the person I am becoming? What if, in the end, I am the only answer I’ll ever find, scattered between continents, buried in lost loves and friendships that burn out like distant stars?

What if I spend my whole life reaching toward the horizon, thinking the answer will be there, but it’s only more sky and clouds drifting away? What if the pain of heartbreak is the closest I come to knowing what deep love is and all that remains is to learn to carry it without letting it unravel me?

What if I never learn to forget what they did to me? If their words sink like ink in water, coloring every memory, every moment I try to reclaim mine? What if forgiveness isn’t the freedom they promise, but an empty room echoing with everything I have yet to heal?

What if life is nothing more than a series of questions that, in their asking, shape us into people who are always a little bit searching, a little bit longing? What if the meaning I ache for is just the ability to hold these questions close, learning to live beside them, and making them my companions instead of my burdens?

What if I’m meant to find beauty in the not-knowing? What if I’m meant to love the imperfection of my life and trust that some questions will stay unanswered, like flowers that only bloom in the dark?

What if the places I travel to are not meant to change me, but to reveal what I’ve carried all along, each destination unearthing fragments of who I am? What if the mountains and oceans I stand before are reminders, whispers from the earth saying, that whatever I am and where I go, I am enough?

What if healing isn’t about forgetting but rather about learning to live alongside the memories, to let them rest in quiet corners, softening over time? What if forgiveness isn’t a clean slate, but a stroke on a canvas still unfinished, blending the colors of pain and grace?

What if the people I’ve loved, the ones I’ve lost, the ones who have bruised and blessed my heart, are all threads of this thing we call love that I’m only beginning to understand? What if their presence was never about staying, but about teaching me how to hold space for both joy and sorrow?

What if my life is a question that will never be answered, a journey that will never find its end? And what if that endlessness is its beauty—a story written in fragments, each chapter filled with longing, each moment a fleeting truth?

What if I never find the words to describe who I am, never find a language to fit the depth of what I feel? What if I’m a thousand unfinished sentences, each one trailing off into silence? And what if that silence, in all its weight and wonder, is as close as I’ll ever come to understanding?

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Tessa Pesicka / Her Campus

What if I am enough, even if I never quite believe it? And what if, in the end, that quiet realization is the closest thing to truth, a flutter of something that floats up from the depths of my being, gentle and unwavering, saying: You are here, and that is enough.

What if the meaning I seek isn’t a destination, but the simple act of walking, of breathing, of bearing witness to this thing called life? What if my questions are not weaknesses, but signs of a soul that refuses to settle for easy answers, that yearns for the unknown, for the beauty of mystery? 

What if, one day, I discover that the questions were never meant to be answered, but to be lived? What if the real meaning comes not from resolution, but from the quiet acceptance of uncertainty, from the way the questions continue to unfold within me, guiding me toward something I cannot yet see, but am always becoming?

Hi, my name is Rowan Ellis-Rissler and I am a journalist for HER Campus at CU Boulder. Born and raised in Boulder, I have cultivated a profound passion for journalism, driven by a desire to connect deeply with people and places around the globe. My academic pursuits are rooted in a dual major in Journalism and Political Science, complemented by a minor in Business Management. Outside the classroom, I am actively engaged in the CU cycling team as a mountain biker and the CU freeride team as a skier. My enthusiasm for the outdoors extends to a significant commitment to photography, where I seek to capture the world through a compelling lens. My professional aspiration is to become a photojournalist or broadcast journalist, channels through which I can combine my love for storytelling with my dedication to making a meaningful impact. I strive to craft narratives that evoke genuine emotions and foster a sense of connection, aiming to help individuals feel less isolated in an ever-evolving world.