At the beginning of 2026, I pointed the judgment spotlight at myself. I showered myself with brutality, honestly, and frankly, a bit of shame. I identified all the expectations I set for myself in 2025, as well as my failure to meet them. I hadn’t joined as many clubs as I wanted to. Never made it a goal to start swimming again. Those recipes sitting in my Pinterest archives… let’s just not talk about it. In all honesty and consciousness, I am always my own worst enemy at the beginning of a new year, not just 2026.
Every year, or even at the start of a new journey (whatever that may entail), I am plagued with a sickness that no medicine can cure. I am dragged underwater by a net stronger than a knife can cut through. I am trapped in a prison with no walls, and somehow, I haven’t the faintest idea where the key is.
Somehow, someway, the idea of the ‘it girl’ seems to follow me around like a dog. Day and night, she preys on me, filling my brain with doubt and excitement all at once. My dream body is just around the corner. I am inches away from becoming my “highest self”. If I do this one workout, read this one book, drink this bottle of flavored water, then suddenly all my problems will be solved.
I am sick of her. And this year, I’m making it my mission to leave her behind.
Now, let me make a very important and necessary distinction of exactly who I am ditching in 2026. Because while many may have a certain idea of what being an ‘it girl’ means, I’m going to convince you that she’s actually two people. And I want to hold one’s hand, and lock the other out.
The term ‘it girl’ is defined as an attractive, well-known young woman with an appealing and magnetic personality. This is pretty much the generic definition of what it means to be an ‘it girl’ without any applied nuance or in relation to time periods.
The 21st-century ‘it girl’, otherwise known as the TikTok ‘it girl’, is a tad bit different. She drinks a gallon of iced water every day, always in a cute matching set with slicked back hair, makes get-ready-with-me (GRWM) content every morning and is often linked heavily with consumeristic habits. It’s less about daily habits and far more about the type of clothes worn, the brand of yoga mat used in reformer pilates, and the collection of aesthetic water bottles. She is always perfect, always presents as her highest self and always knows where she’s going in life.
I’m really not a fan of her. But somehow, I always find that I compare myself to her.
Yes, life would be easier if all my problems were solved by the tips people give out on TikTok. Each year, we see countless videos of flawless women telling us their beauty and lifestyle secrets, all with the aim of transitioning ourselves into the 21st century ‘it girl’. Be cautious though. A steady stream of misguided hacks can conjure up feelings of unworthiness and shame in our hearts, as we realize we are not where we want to be.
Let’s focus on the origins of the ‘it girl’ now.
The term ‘it girl’ was actually coined in the 1920s by British author, Elinor Glyn. Describing an intangible, magnetic charm, the term was then connected to popular silent film star, Clara Bow, during the movie It, where she became the “It Girl”. The ‘it girl’ of the 1920s is also famous for her special sex appeal, but that’s not really the energy I’m trying to attract in 2026.
In 2026, I want to focus not on consumeristic habits that determine if I am worthy of being admired, but rather on being magnetic. That is the one and only element of the ‘it girl’ I want to embody. And the rest? I’m not too concerned about it.
I’m sick of the need to rebrand. Sick of feeling like I need to wipe my slate clean. Of believing that all the effort I put into becoming a healthier and happier version of myself the previous year was a waste of time. I think it’s rather unfair to dismiss everything we did prior to the start of a new year just because we saw one video that informed us we did it all wrong.
There is no perfect time to create new habits except for when you feel like you’re ready. Discarding your whole identity every time the calendar resets has become boring, in my opinion. Whether it’s the beginning of the year or three-quarters into it, creating your image around who you want to be and not who you think you should be is the healthiest thing you can do.
Don’t embrace the ‘it girl’. Embrace the girl you are. The girl whose life has led her here. The girl who works hard and knows what she values. Don’t throw that all away because you listened to one person who told you all your progress was for nothing. That doesn’t sound very ‘it girl’ to me.