Those of us who have gone through heartbreak know the desire to give up on love altogether all too well. You once firmly believed the two of you were indestructible to any barrier or force. Even the strongest storm couldn’t blow you two apart because when you were together, you held the power of the moon and the sun… but unfortunately, you were wrong.
Many of you may call, or may have called, yourself a “hopeless romantic”. I absolutely hate this term with every cell in my body. According to The Cornell Daily Sun, “hopeless romantics are people who cannot help but fall in love with every little thing in life”, and “love makes things make sense (to them)”. I align with what one might call a hopeless romantic and I agree that love makes the world make sense – but this is not limited to romantic love. When responding to the preliminary statement from The Cornell Daily Sun, I think hopeless romantics have gained pity from our society because they are viewed as too “soft”, “sensitive”, or “gullible” in response to the sometimes cruel outcomes of love. However, I reject the notion that it’s silly to believe fiercely in the power and resilience of our ability to give and receive love. The people who created this term, I can only assume, had experienced heartbreak after love and decided that it was simply a waste of time (i.e., hopeless). Hopeless romantics hear this label placed upon them, and even though there is so much pushing back against love in this world, there is still that glimmer of hope that overshines all their doubt that love is real. They know they are not hopeless. Instead, they are hopeful, and there is nothing wrong with hope as long as it doesn’t consume you to the point where romantic love decides how you view yourself.
There is no sugarcoating the fact that heartbreak feels like burning in the effervescent fire your love once was, but just because it ends doesn’t mean it was never beautiful and real. In other words: heartbreak is absolutely awful, but it doesn’t end all love, for love is everywhere. It’s in the birds who make nests together, the trees who hold each other up by their branches, the glimmer of light off the snow that makes you smile on the coldest of days, and so on, and so forth. It’s important to never forget that love comes in many forms, so take a moment to appreciate the people in your life who dried your tears and made you crack a smile after you told them the news.Â
Just because heartbreak exists, and is almost unavoidable, doesn’t mean that hoping for romantic love is essentially “hopeless”. There is no issue in hoping for and believing in romantic love (unless you deem your worth over whether you’re in a romantic relationship or not). If you have a stable foundation in yourself, then the cracks in the heart won’t hurt as much. They’ll still hurt, don’t get me wrong – but you will be able to get through it much easier knowing that you are an embodiment of love, and that doesn’t end just because one person walks out of your life. Just because it’s over doesn’t mean you wasted your time.Â
A mantra I’m trying to use going forward is: love wholly and bravely, and have gratitude. This is the happiest way to lead a life, even though it is easier said than done. Believing in love and being grateful even at a time of great loss are some of the most challenging things a person can go through. Take a small step and start your journey back to the most important love: love for yourself. Remember that there is infinite love inside you, even if it hits a shortage for a while after a loss. Before you know it, there will be an overflow of love guiding you to all the people who deserve it – most notably, yourself.
Hopeless Romantics: A Product of Pop Culture and Experience – The Cornell Daily Sun. 30 Nov. 1AD, https://cornellsun.com/2022/01/30/hopeless-romantics-a-product-of-pop-culture-and-experience/,