As we start to enter further into the first semester we will begin to get those familiar feelings of pressure, stress, and anxiety. Summer has finally come to a close and our lives are finally getting back in a routine. But as hard working students we need to remember to pace and protect ourselves from negative energies. Often times we as young adults feel like we need to have our lives together and everything needs to be perfect when in all reality it’s the complete opposite. We absolutely do not have to have everything together right now, and we are allowed to be a hot mess because we are young and life is just beginning. We stress ourselves out so much because we worry about relationships, school, and becoming successful and doing so is ultimately destroying ourselves. A huge form of self-destruction is letting little things get under our skin and it messes with our emotional stability, which can affect us physically.
Did you know 43% of college students experience insomnia after a breakup? While I totally support young love, I will never agree with putting all of my energy into a relationship that might end before I graduate college, and that is for any relationship you may have formed, not just a romantic one. I had to learn how to let things go because I started to notice the toll the stress was taking on my body. I allowed myself to be affected by toxic relationships that I was no longer in. It got to the point where I was starting to notice the exhaustion and the mood swings. I was overwhelmed and allowed my relationship to consume my every thought, all of this on top of being a freshman in college. It took me months to realize that I had inserted myself into one of the most toxic of relationships and that angered me because I knew that I was not raised to be the way that I was. I was angry that I allowed myself to be manipulated, especially when I knew better. Over the summer I picked up 3 habits that healed and helped me find myself again:
1. Yoga: I have always wanted to do yoga but I could never find an affordable class. So over the summer when my mom started taking free classes at her job I decided to tag along. Yoga completely changed my body. Before I started yoga I was tense and on edge but, once I started my body became so much more relaxed. Yoga will improve your posture, build muscle strength, increase blood flow and improve your brain function. There was definitely an overall change in my attitude, I was much more energetic and happier.
2. Journaling: Journaling has always been a part of my healing process because I was never really comfortable with verbally expressing myself, and I’m still working on that ‘til this day. But if you’re like me and have trouble expressing yourself or you just are not comfortable talking out your issues, write them down! It is so much better to release all of those bottled up emotions than to hold them in. Journaling also helped me organize my thoughts, which are usually scattered. If you have high anxiety this may be one of the solutions for you.
3. Cutting people off!: This is something people like to brag about on social media, which is always pretty annoying. However, cutting off toxic people is one of the most freeing experiences because any weight that they may have put on your shoulders is lifted. This was the most difficult for me because, I, like many others get attached to the people around me. So no, eliminating people from your life isn’t as easy as the rest of the world makes it seem and it will take some time, but the end result is absolutely amazing. People who are constantly putting all of their problems on you are toxic. People who try to hold you back from accomplishing your goals are toxic. People who manipulate you are toxic. You should never feel like you can’t be your complete self around your family, peers, and lover and if you feel this way it is definitely a sign that you need to remove yourself from the relationship.
I know what it’s like to feel like you’ve lost a piece of yourself when you feel a relationship coming to an end. It is the worst feeling, but remember that things happen for a reason and you might end up happier than you ever been.