Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
Screen Shot 2020 02 06 at 54546 PM?width=1280&height=854&fit=crop&auto=webp&dpr=4
Screen Shot 2020 02 06 at 54546 PM?width=398&height=256&fit=crop&auto=webp&dpr=4
Love Jones / New Line Cinema
CAU | Wellness > Sex + Relationships

Learning What Intent Is Behind Dating #DatingWithIntent

Makayla Atkins Student Contributor, Clark Atlanta University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at CAU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Valentine’s Day can be a whirlwind of romantic gestures, flowers, and heart-shaped everything. But in the middle of all the excitement (or pressure), it’s important to ask yourself: “What’s the intent behind dating? Are you looking for something serious, something casual, or just enjoying the moment? And just as importantly what is the other person looking for?”

Why Intent Matters

Dating without clear intent can lead to confusion, mismatched expectations, and unnecessary heartbreak. Knowing why you’re dating helps you set boundaries, communicate your needs, and avoid wasting time on people who don’t align with your goals.

Ask yourself:

Celina Timmerman-Overalls Tattoos And Stripes
Celina Timmerman / Her Campus

~ Am I looking for commitment, or am I just exploring my options?

~ Am I emotionally ready for a relationship, or do I need time to focus on myself?

~ Does this person’s intentions align with mine?

Understanding your own motives helps you enter dating with confidence instead of just going with the flow and hoping for the best.

Signs of Clear (and Misleading) Intentions

Some people will tell you exactly what they want, while others leave things vague. Here are some clues:

Green Flag: They communicate openly, are consistent in their actions, and make an effort to get to know you beyond surface-level interactions.

Red Flag : They avoid defining the relationship, send mixed signals, or only show up when it’s convenient for them.

If someone’s actions and words don’t match, that’s a red flag. Someone who truly values you will make their intentions known without you having to guess.

Dating With Purpose

Being intentional doesn’t mean rushing into something serious. It just means knowing what you want and being upfront about it. Whether you’re dating for fun, looking for a partner, or just figuring things out, being clear with yourself and others saves time and emotional energy.

This Valentine’s Day, instead of focusing on who you’re with, focus on why you’re dating in the first place. Clarity is the best way to find connections that truly align with you.

I am a fashion design student at Clark Atlanta University with a passion for creative expression and storytelling through style. With experience in modeling, event promotion, and branding, I thrive at the intersection of fashion, beauty, and marketing. When I’m not designing or hosting events, you’ll find me brainstorming innovative ideas for the next big campaign or planning my future in the fashion industry.