A new chapter. A new beginning. That’s usually what we hear after something traumatic has happened to us.
I think starting a new chapter can be one of the most empowering steps we can take for ourselves. It allows us to better understand ourselves, explore what we love, and what makes us, ourselves. For me, it’s been doing more alone.
When going through a heartbreak, it’s common to feel alone. To feel weak yet heavy from the pain. We start to idealize what we thought the relationship was like, hindering us from the ability to let go. Endings can be one of the hardest events we experience. When we need to close a book, put it back on the shelf and let go.
But I hope to spread some hope for anyone else in my position, or to be in my position. To let you know that these feelings are temporary, the pain won’t last forever. It’s okay to not be okay. But it’s even more important to learn how to empower yourself. Because when we learn to love ourselves, we have the ability to love, learn and appreciate all that is around us. It allows us to start surrounding ourselves only with people who have a positive purpose in our life, rather than chasing those who show us no effort to be there.
My new chapter, which I hope can help you too, has been by doing more alone. Going out alone, eating alone, shopping alone, traveling alone, and so much more. Scary, right?
But it’s okay. I’m not an introvert by any means, as I’m quite a talkative person when you mention even the slightest thing I can relate to. But my last relationship made me feel so dependent, so incapable of being more than what I was, which left me feeling not enough.
But over the last couple of months, I’ve come to quite of few realizations. Most importantly from these, I’ve realized how much self-love I have found. Never before did I realize how little I had respected and valued who I was as a person. But since removing the past from my life, I’ve started to be happier. My anxiety has gone down, I’m more self-aware and more in control of myself.
Doing things alone is so beneficial in that it not only encourages independence, but self-love and respect as well. It’s allowed me to be more self-aware of how I’m feeling and what I really want in life. I can do what I’ve always wanted. I can find the love in myself that I didn’t know was there.
Healing isn’t linear. We will have ups and downs. Some days you may feel as though nothing can bring you down and you’ve truly moved on. Then like a truck, the pain comes back. That’s natural. Just trust in the process and one day you’ll realize how much happier this new chapter in your life has become. One day you can look back and smile, because the pain from the past has brought you to where you are now, and that now is something wonderful.
Rep and body image courtesy of Pexels