As a 20 year old coming up on the end of my third year of college, I often find myself at a crossroads between both exiting my teenage years and a lot of times still feeling like I am that same version of myself, to the realization that I am entering my twenties and meeting the adult version of myself differently a little more every day. Something that the year of 20 has taught me is that there is an in-between that can be found, and a transition period is necessary in order to move from one chapter of life to another. During this transition, there are a few prevalent things I have noticed becoming more and more valuable in my life.
Cutting Out Fast Fashion and Curating a Capsule Wardrobe
As I am going into the decade of my twenties, I’ve noticed that my habits with shopping have shifted. I am beginning to phase out fast fashion and buying lots of cheap items that will get worn once and thrown in my closet for months to eventually be tossed, and shifting over to spending a little more on quality items that I will actually wear regularly, keep for years, and that won’t be essentially falling apart after a few wears. This also includes incorporating thrifting into my cycle of buying clothes, and implementing more sustainable ways of passing clothes on to the next person. Utilizing things like Facebook marketplace and websites for second hand clothing selling, I have definitely started to build more of a quality closet, rather than buying lots of cheap items to wear once and never get use out of again.
Being More Outspoken Rather than Biting my Tongue
Growing up and through my teenage years especially, I was under the false impression that it is better to not speak up in times where something is bothering you in order to save face and avoid confrontation, in hopes to not be seen as a “drama starter” or be misunderstood, a false label that is often placed on young women who do not act as people pleasers. This parallels with the fact that I also was someone who dealt with a lot of social anxiety in my early years and have learned to grow out of that over time. As I get older, I realize that it is actually much better to face an issue head on in a confident, collected manner, especially when something is upsetting or your boundaries are being crossed. It is ok to not always avoid conflict to try to “keep the peace”, and oftentimes speaking up for yourself or voicing your true opinion is much more rewarding than avoiding issues for the sake of avoiding issues.
There is Peace in Routine, but Allow Room for Chaos
As someone who has always been an extremely routine oriented person my entire life, coming to college and filling up my weeks with a busy schedule, I’ve learned that sometimes you have to learn to let things go. Your room won’t always be spotless and you won’t always have time to do your full skincare routine every single night before bed – some nights you’ll go out with friends and go to sleep in your makeup. Most mornings you’ll wake up early and make a healthy breakfast, and some days you’ll sleep in and get Starbucks – which doesn’t mean you were any less successful. Holding yourself to the standard that you always have to check everything off your list before you can relax and breathe is unrealistic, especially when schedules get filled up with assignments, sorority events, jobs, friends, so on and so forth. In entering my twenties, I have definitely learned that holding yourself to a good structure from day to day is almost crucial in a successful and balanced life, however holding yourself to an unattainable standard of perfection is not healthy or helpful, and actually reduces productivity for me personally in terms of avoiding burnout.
Ultimately, there is much to be learned from transition periods in life, particularly those that may be challenging. In the period between leaving my teens and entering my twenties, I have noticed a shift in the things I value in life, and I have learned to embrace the change as it allows for growth, even though sometimes growth is uncomfortable.