Dear Thigh Gap,
You’ve been pretty popular lately, haven’t you? Despite the bad boy rep you’ve acquired (after all, Instagram refuses to even acknowledge your existence), virtually every girl knows who you are and can’t stop thinking about you. They want you. I think a little part of your soul enjoys all the attention, but honestly, it’s driving me crazy. Sometimes I’ll be up late, thinking about you and wondering why I don’t get to see you more often. Do all our memories together mean nothing to you? What about that time in eighth grade where the only things in our closet were size zero jeans? Or the time we went to the beach and for once, I didn’t want to untag myself from every picture on Facebook? Where did all of that go? Now I just cross my legs whenever I sit down, refusing to let them rest side-by-side out of fear that my thighs might – God forbid – touch.
I guess what I’m trying to say is I’ve had enough. You can certainly be in my life, but you can’t take center stage anymore; I should focus on myself. This means no more skipping meals, no more feeling guilty for loving pizza, and no more unattainable gym goals. Sure, I might get a little jealous when I inevitably see you with other girls, and yeah, maybe a small part of my heart will always love you, but I won’t spend all my time and energy thinking about you anymore.
You might be glad to hear that I’ve resolved to start exercising more. Not for you, but for me. I’m also going to start eating more vegetables, drinking more water and waking up earlier. Hell, I’ll even delete my Netflix account. (Okay, maybe not that last one, but baby steps, right?) If you want to come back into my life, then it’ll happen naturally – I know now that I can’t force it. The bottom line is that I need to be happy and healthy, with or without you.
Last but not least, I want to thank you for all of the memories. We had good days and bad ones, but after all is said and done, I’ve learned a lot from this. Who knows? Maybe one day we can still be friends.
All my love,
Nikki